IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The bar chart shows the share of poverty of the rural areas in the years 1993 and 2002. The pie chart shows the rural area share and the urban area share of poverty in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the share of poverty of the rural areas in the years 1993 and 2002. The pie chart shows the rural area share and the urban area share of poverty in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #poverty #areas #years #area #summarise #information #features #comparisons
The bar chart gives the percentage of
poverty
 in rural areas in 1993 and 2002
whereas
 the pie chart describes the rural
area
 share and urban
area
 share of
poverty
 in the
year
 2002.
Overal
Correct your spelling
Overall
show examples
, we can understand that East
Asia
 and
Pacific
Correct article usage
the Pacific
show examples
 region has the most
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 of
poverty
 and Latin America and
Caribbean
Correct article usage
the Caribbean
show examples
 has the least share in both years. From the bar graph,
it is clear that
 East
Asia
 and
Pacific
Correct article usage
the Pacific
show examples
 region
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
the a
Choose an article
a
show examples
 higher percentage of
poverty
(90%) in 1993 and 2002,
also
that is
 the only region that
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 no change in both years.
However
, Europe and Central
Asia
 had
low
Correct article usage
a low
show examples
poverty
 of 50% in 1993, but it increased to 65% by the
year
 2002.
Additionaly
Correct your spelling
Additionally
, Latin America and
Caribbean
Correct article usage
the Caribbean
show examples
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 almost 50% of
poverty
 in 1993, but by the
year
2002
Add a comma
,2002
show examples
 they managed to
decreases
Change the verb
decrease
show examples
 their
poverty
 by 40%. From the pie chart, we can conclude that in 2002 rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 had a
poverty
 ratio of 76%
where
Correct word choice
whereas
show examples
 urban
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
 only had 24%.
Moreover
,
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
show examples
 to 1993 all the other rural areas(Middle
east
Capitalize word
East
show examples
 and
Noth
Correct your spelling
North
show examples
 Africa, South
Asia
 and Sub-Saharan Africa) managed to decrease their
poverty
 percentage even by a little bit by the
year
 2002 .
Submitted by arjunakrishnan02 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words poverty, area, year, asia with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼

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