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Writing Samples
Band 6

The bar chart shows the share of poverty of the rural areas in the years 1993 and 2002. The pie chart shows the rural area share and the urban area share of poverty in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart shows the share of poverty of the rural areas in the years 1993 and 2002. The pie chart shows the rural area share and the urban area share of poverty in 2002. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#bar #poverty #areas #years #area #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The bar chart gives the percentage of
poverty
Use synonyms
 in rural areas in 1993 and 2002
whereas
Linking Words
 the pie chart describes the rural
area
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 share and urban
area
Use synonyms
 share of
poverty
Use synonyms
 in the
year
Use synonyms
 2002.
Overal
Correct your spelling
Overall
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, we can understand that East
Asia
Use synonyms
 and
Pacific
Correct article usage
the Pacific
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 region has the most
percent
Replace the word
percentage
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 of
poverty
Use synonyms
 and Latin America and
Caribbean
Correct article usage
the Caribbean
show examples
 has the least share in both years. From the bar graph,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 East
Asia
Use synonyms
 and
Pacific
Correct article usage
the Pacific
show examples
 region
has
Wrong verb form
had
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the a
Choose an article
a
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 higher percentage of
poverty
Use synonyms
(90%) in 1993 and 2002,
also
Linking Words
that is
Linking Words
 the only region that
has
Wrong verb form
had
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 no change in both years.
However
Linking Words
, Europe and Central
Asia
Use synonyms
 had
low
Correct article usage
a low
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poverty
Use synonyms
 of 50% in 1993, but it increased to 65% by the
year
Use synonyms
 2002.
Additionaly
Correct your spelling
Additionally
, Latin America and
Caribbean
Correct article usage
the Caribbean
show examples
has
Wrong verb form
had
show examples
 almost 50% of
poverty
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 in 1993, but by the
year
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2002
Add a comma
,2002
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 they managed to
decreases
Change the verb
decrease
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 their
poverty
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 by 40%. From the pie chart, we can conclude that in 2002 rural
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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 had a
poverty
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 ratio of 76%
where
Correct word choice
whereas
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 urban
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
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 only had 24%.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
comparing
Wrong verb form
compared
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 to 1993 all the other rural areas(Middle
east
Capitalize word
East
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 and
Noth
Correct your spelling
North
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 Africa, South
Asia
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 and Sub-Saharan Africa) managed to decrease their
poverty
Use synonyms
 percentage even by a little bit by the
year
Use synonyms
 2002 .
Submitted by arjunakrishnan02 on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words poverty, area, year, asia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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