IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

large shopping malls are replacing small shops. What is opinion on this? do you think this is good or bad change?

#malls #shops #change
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
There is no denying the fact that the Small shopping takes the Place of the large shopping.
While
Linking Words
 it is a commonly held belief malls are closing the big shops and replacing them with smaller stores, there is
also
Linking Words
 an argument that opposes it. In my opinion, I consider
that is
Linking Words
 a negative change. First of all, the tiny stories couldn't have changed to open in the centre, but if
this
Linking Words
 system has been important,
then
Linking Words
 they will give those opportunities to become great shops,
in other words
Linking Words
, anything beginning with new skills,but there are many opponents, so nobody will give them chance to improve their self.
For example
Linking Words
, there is a businessman called Ahmed, who started a small company,
Although
Linking Words
his
Correct pronoun usage
he
show examples
start
Wrong verb form
started
show examples
 his own business
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
society didn't look at him, but after time the boss of Salam Mall, took his hands, and awarded him a huge place, so
this
Linking Words
 has been a great opportunity, so now he one of the effective man in the world,
however
Linking Words
, we should expect the beginner shoppes. Another point to consider, the new system will be solid, and heavy for ancient People, who are old businesses, because,
this
Linking Words
 role takes off their skills, and after time they will back down. If we closed the big stories, it is
also
Linking Words
 possible to say that, difficult for the smallest shop too,because if we replaced the smallest
then
Linking Words
 the biggest,
such
Linking Words
 as we are telling them, if they become famous and wealthy, we will talk their stores. in conclusion, despite having different views, I strongly believe that,
while
Linking Words
 we want to improve and encourage our community to be successful, we should think about these advantages and disadvantages.
Submitted by ra18d.ai on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: