IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The table shows Proportions of Pupils attending Four Secondary School Types between 2010 and 2020. Summarize the information by choosing and reporting the key features and make comparisons where relevant. Secondary School Attendance 2010 2015 2020 Specialist Schools 15% 18% 20% Grammar Schools 26% 21% 17% Voluntary-controlled Schools 56% 42% 24% Community Schools 15% 37% 62%

The table shows Proportions of Pupils attending Four Secondary School Types between 2010 and 2020. Summarize the information by choosing and reporting the key features and make comparisons where relevant. Secondary School Attendance 2010 2015 2020 Specialist Schools 15% 18% 20% Grammar Schools 26% 21% 17% Voluntary-controlled Schools 56% 42% 24% Community Schools 15% 37% 62%
#proportions #pupils #four #school #information #features #comparisons #attendance #specialist #schools #grammar #community
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The table below illustrates information about the
amont
Correct your spelling
amount
 of people who register in different four
secondry
Correct your spelling
secondary
schools
Use synonyms
 from the period of 2010 until 2020.
According to
Linking Words
 the information provided, it shows
voluntary-controlled
Correct article usage
a voluntary-controlled
show examples
 start with
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 amount of students and it decreases gradually.
In contrast
Linking Words
, community school start with
low
Add an article
a low
the low
show examples
 amount of
student
Use synonyms
 and increases significantly in 2020. Meanwhile,
specialists school
Fix the agreement mistake
specialist schools
show examples
 were gradually increasing every year. If we look more closely, we can see that 56% of
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
join
Wrong verb form
joined
show examples
 voluntary-controlled in 2010.
However
Linking Words
, the number
decreases
Wrong verb form
decreased
show examples
 to 24% in 2020.
In contrast
Linking Words
, 15% of
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
join
Wrong verb form
joined
show examples
 community
schools
Use synonyms
 and
significantily
Rephrase
apply
show examples
the number
increases
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to 62% in 2020. Meanwhile,
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 who
apply
Wrong verb form
applied
show examples
 to specialist
schools
Use synonyms
 were only 15% in 2010 and gradually
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 to 20% in 2020. To summarize, most of the
Use synonyms
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
were apply
Wrong verb form
applied
show examples
 to voluntary-controlled
school
Fix the agreement mistake
schools
show examples
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 2010 but in 2020 community
schools
Use synonyms
become
Wrong verb form
became
show examples
 a trend above students.
Submitted by mneeraaljalahma on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in contrast".
▼
Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words schools, student with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "decreases" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increases" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 3 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: