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student perform better in school when they are rewarder than punished. to what extend do you agree or disagree?

#student #school #rewarder
Schools play an important role in the upbringing of society. Rewarding
students
 is better than punishing them. To an extent, I agree with
this
 nation and the reasons will be discussed in the forthcoming paragraphs. To embark on,
students
 maximise their skills if they are rewarded. To be more precise, scholars will be self-motivated to do more in their academics if they get appreciation.
This
 quality can help them in the future to achieve their desires.
For instance
, providing presents to scholars when they achieve a good mark can help them to be consistent in their next exams as well.
In addition
, pupils do hard work to achieve excellence in their studies,
this
 will teach them working harder with a strong determination ends up in achieving those desires.
Therefore
, the young public will be determined in their ways.
Moreover
, punishments in front of the peer group can make children
to be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
less confident
also
, they will hate to go to school
due to
 their less favourable experience. To illustrate, if a teacher scolds a child in front of his classmates that may not be helpful for a student's improvement.
However
, minor punishment is required in schools to maintain discipline
as well as
 to improve student's social values.
For example
, giving a small fine when they are late on a regular basis or not following uniform policies will make them understand mistakes. In my opinion, rewarding
students
 possesses more benefits than punishing them, even for a small situation the teacher should encourage their
students
 if they did that for the right purpose. To recapitulate, children show better academic performance once they get rewards
along with
 that they do hard work to achieve their aims. Punishment to a smaller extent helps a student to be disciplined in their school
as well as
 in their future life.
Submitted by ansamerrin987 on

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coherence cohesion
Provide a more explicit thesis statement in the introduction.
task achievement
Expand on the reasons for agreeing with the statement.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your conclusion summarizes the main points of your essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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