Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some
people
believe that
music
is a powerful tool to bring
people
of different
cultures
and ages together. Personally, I agree with
this
point of view and I will explain my reasons in the following paragraphs. It is a clear fact that
music
is an art form
that is
enjoyed by
people
of all ages and
cultures
from all around the
world
. Regardless of their background,
people
can appreciate
music
for its emotional and artistic value.
For instance
, during the
covid-19
Correct your spelling
COVID-19
show examples
pandemic, musicians around the
world
came together to create virtual performances that brought
people
together and provided hope during difficult times.
Moreover
, there are many different
music
festivals all over the
world
which have different performers from different
cultures
. They might speak different languages or don't know much about each other's
cultures
, but they have a common language which is the
music
itself.
On the other hand
, the audiences are
also
from different countries who speak different languages, but they all enjoy the performances.
Moreover
, individuals from all parts of the globe can comprehend the meaning of the same song through its melody.
Furthermore
,
music
can mitigate the gap between elderly
people
and new generations. To illustrate, we see different
people
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
different ages go to college to study
music
, which shows that
music
has
this
magical power to bring
people
of all age groups together. In conclusion, in my opinion,
music
is the biggest common language in the
world
, which plays a key role in uniting
people
across all age groups
as well as
from different cultural backgrounds.
Submitted by parvane_ava on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Provide more examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a clear and logical progression of ideas throughout the essay.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Pay more attention to grammatical accuracy.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • universal language
  • evoke
  • connect
  • diverse audiences
  • cultural exchange
  • generational gaps
  • shared experiences
  • unifying force
What to do next:
Look at other essays: