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Band 3

More and more people want to buy famous brands of clothes, car and other items. Why is this trend? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#people #brands #clothes #car #items #trend #development
Recent
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A recent
The recent
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 trend is getting
luxury
products
 from
high end
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high-end
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 brands
nowadays
Rephrase
apply
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. In my perspective of life, spending a lot of money
to
Change preposition
on
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products
don`t
Correct pronoun usage
that don`t
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 deserve their price is useless and
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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Correct article usage
a negetive
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negetive
Correct your spelling
negative
 impact on society. In
this
 essay, the negative impacts of buying
luxury
products
 and the reason
of
Change preposition
for
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this
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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 will be discussed. Buying
high value
Add a hyphen
high-value
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 items
is
Verb problem
has
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such
 a popular act in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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recent years. People tend to buy things that they don`t need or won`t need in the future. In my opinion, cause of
this
 act
rely
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relies
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 on consuming every other
things
Change to a singular noun
thing
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 pretty fast.
Also
, social media and
the
Correct article usage
apply
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advertisements mostly affect
this
trending
Replace the word
trend
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. People may feel to be pushed to get something brand new and highly value
products
.
Tendecy
Correct article usage
The Tendecy
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 to buy
luxury
 items from famous brands
continuesly
Correct your spelling
continues
has
Wrong verb form
to have
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very
Correct article usage
a very
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 awful
affact
Correct your spelling
effect
 on
become
Change the verb form
becoming
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 a developed country. Because people are getting used to
keep
Verb problem
apply
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consuming rather than producing new
products
 which may cause
end
Add an article
the end
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 of the nations. Societies
who
Correct pronoun usage
that
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 never produce
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
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will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
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fade away day by day eventually. In conclusion,
non stop
Add a hyphen
non-stop
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 trend to buy new
luxury
 items is mostly
impelemented
Correct your spelling
implemented
 by various social media platforms and their advertisement procedures. In the end, neither
this
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
show examples
 of society needs to be ended nor they are unable to be developed to produce new technologies or any other innovations.
Submitted by fyzalkac on

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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The main points need further development and clarification.
task achievement
Provide specific examples to support your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Consumerism
  • Brand loyalty
  • Investment
  • Aspiration
  • Trendsetter
  • Affluent
  • Mimicry
  • Conformity
  • Identity
  • Self-esteem
  • Status
  • Perception
  • Advertise
  • Promote
  • Influence
  • Peer pressure
  • Societal expectations
What to do next:
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