IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people think travelling abroad band is a valuable experience for young people. Others think it wastes too much time and expense. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #band #wastes #time #expense
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People vary in opinion related to moving away from
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 country.Some folks
believed
Wrong verb form
believe
show examples
 that it is
virtuous
Correct article usage
a virtuous
show examples
 and precious life movement whilst, others oppose that idea by saying that it is
Use synonyms
time consuming
Add a hyphen
time-consuming
show examples
 and expensive.
As per
Change preposition
In
show examples
 my opinion, both viewpoints have valid reasons and I will discuss both ideas. On the one hand, the proponents of
former
Correct article usage
the former
show examples
 idea argued that it is
easiest
Change the article
the easiest
show examples
 way to explore any
country
Change noun form
country's
show examples
culture
Use synonyms
.In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other words,by living with native dwellers you can adopt their language, dress style or their religion,
Moreover
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 provides
opportunity
Add an article
an opportunity
the opportunity
show examples
 to examine their
Use synonyms
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 values. To illustrate, recently I watched the famous
Mr beast
Correct your spelling
Mr. Beast
show examples
 YouTuber documentary about
pakistan
Change the capitalization
Pakistan
show examples
culture
Use synonyms
,
on
Change preposition
In
show examples
 that video, he
say
Wrong verb form
said
show examples
 that
I
Correct pronoun usage
he
show examples
 learnt numerous righteous things about humanity, traditions many more by moving to
pakistan
Change the capitalization
Pakistan
show examples
. Contrarily, the
opponite
Correct your spelling
opposite
 of former view opine that the roving to another country can be
extrvagant
Correct your spelling
extravagant
 and
Use synonyms
time consuming
Add a hyphen
time-consuming
show examples
 activity. There are a lot of expenses
such
Linking Words
 as flight booking, hotel booking and transportation we have to bear,
as a result
Linking Words
, it is considered as fanciful activity.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it
also
Linking Words
 requires
time
Use synonyms
 for fulfilling and uploading necessary documents, planning, shopping and preparations.
For instance
Linking Words
, a study which was
conduct
Wrong verb form
conducted
show examples
 by
Pakistani
Correct article usage
the Pakistani
show examples
 tourist department in 2014 ,
according to
Linking Words
 that,50
percente
Correct your spelling
per cent
folks
Change preposition
of folks
show examples
 cannot afford their basic life needs in their latter years,
due to
Linking Words
 their
lawaish
Correct your spelling
lavish
 lifestyle in
younger
Add an article
the younger
a younger
show examples
 era.
To sum up
Linking Words
, the issue of moving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad always disputes
depates
Correct your spelling
debates
. Personally,I
believed
Wrong verb form
believe
show examples
 that moving
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
abroad is
time
Use synonyms
wasting
Replace the word
waste
show examples
 and
castly
Correct your spelling
costly
 action,
while
Linking Words
 it
also
Linking Words
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
constructive
Add an article
a constructive
show examples
 effect
such
Linking Words
 as
Use synonyms
culture
Replace the word
cultural
show examples
 exploration.
Submitted by notkhan01 on

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content
Ensure that your introduction clearly states the topic and your position on it.
structure
Organize your essay with clear paragraphs and a logical progression of ideas.
content
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
grammar
Check your grammar and sentence structures for errors.
vocabulary
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enrich your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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