In some countries , owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation

#countries #home #people #be #case #situation

Nowadays, many

people

prefer to be a homeowner rather than

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

a tenant. There are many reasons why

this

is the case. Personally, in my opinion, there are both pros and cons

for

Change preposition

show examples

this

situation and I will explain my reasons in the following paragraphs.

To begin

with, I think one of the most important reasons why

people

choose to own a

house

is that, they don't need to be worried about moving to a new

house

every year. Most tenants are getting annoyed by moving each year as it is too expensive.

Furthermore

, most

people

prefer to spend

money

mortgage

Add an article

a mortgage

show examples

instead

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

rent. They believe that by spending

money

on renting

home

Add an article

a home

show examples

, they are wasting their wealth. I take my parents as an example. They bought a

house

twenty years ago and now it has only remained five years more to

payoff

Correct your spelling

pay off

show examples

their mortgage and after they will own their

house

for the rest of their life.

In addition

, some

people

think that by being a

home owner

Correct your spelling

homeowner

show examples

you can show others the quality of your life and be a rich person in their views.

On the other hand

, it is not

much

Rephrase

very

show examples

easy to own a

house

. You have to have enough

money

for the down payment in order to buy a

house

. Not many

people

can afford the expenses to become a

home owner

Correct your spelling

homeowner

show examples

specially

Replace the word

especially

show examples

young adults who just got married.

As a result

, they ask their parents to help them financially and in some cases the

parent

Fix the agreement mistake

parents

show examples

don't want to reject their kids and will help them even if they are not capable

Change preposition

apply

show examples

and they will go under pressure.

To conclude

, there are both advantages and disadvantages aspects of owning a

house

however

, I believe that it should be viewed as a positive aspect as you don't waste your

money

by buying it.

Submitted by parvane_ava on Tue Oct 03 2023

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Provide a more clear introduction and conclusion to your essay.

Task Response

Ensure that your main points are well-supported with examples and explanations.

Coherence and Cohesion

Add more transitional phrases to improve the coherence and flow of the essay.

Lexical Resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance your essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Pay attention to subject-verb agreement and use proper punctuation marks.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
12Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

310 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: <4

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

ownership
renting
importance
sense of security
stability
financial investment
asset
customize
decorate
belonging
community
potential
future generations
long-term
cost advantage
control
living space

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In some countries , owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. why might this be the case? Do you think this is a positive or negative situation

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Nowadays many people travel to foreign countries for pleasure. Some believe this travel has a negative impact on the countries travelled to. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In many countries governments are investing in new technology to deal with the public. why is this happening? do you think this is an appropriate use of government money?

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important to a chilcd's development as other subjects, so it should be a compulsory in high schools. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

people believe that poverty is the cause of crime .To what extant do you agree or not .

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.