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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting the usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

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In a recent time, people with
health
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 issues have become the primary concern of the healthcare system.
However
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, individuals with medical conditions seek alternative medications and treatment methods rather than consulting a physician, and
this
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 is an alarming situation. In
this
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 essay, I will explain the negative
effects
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 of
this
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 approach with supportive reasons. Treatment without consulting a doctor can lead to various detrimental
effects
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. They are unaware of many medical conditions. They search for their
health
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 problems on Google or YouTube and do treatment with home remedies which is a completely negative development. Typhoid,
for instance
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, is the most common disease in Asian countries.
Although
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 there is an antibiotic called ciprofloxacin for the eradication of disease, still in many areas they try alternative practices, resulting in high mortality rates.
Furthermore
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,
due to
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 the lack of awareness, people use alternative methods, and
as a result
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, various side
effects
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 including allergic reactions occur in the body.
On the other hand
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, individuals often lack knowledge about the correct dosage and administration of various herbal substances. Incorrect medication choices or exceeding recommended dosages can exacerbate
health
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 conditions.
According to
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 the FDA, dosage is very important for the administration of drugs, and if we exceed the amount, it can affect our body organs, particularly the liver because it is involved in drug metabolism.
Therefore
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, it is important to always consult a doctor or a pharmacist, especially when patients experience discomfort with prescribed medication. In conclusion, those people who try other medications and methods without consulting a doctor, face serious issues
according to
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 their
health
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. Side
effects
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 can occur
due to
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 wrong medication and can
also
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 result in increased morbidity and mortality rates.

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Introduction & Conclusion
Strive for a clear and concise introduction that outlines your stance and the main points you will discuss. This helps in setting a defined structure for your essay.
Task Response
Incorporate a balanced discussion by considering both sides of the argument, even if you lean towards one. This demonstrates an understanding of the complexity of the issue.
Coherence & Cohesion
Use a wider range of linking phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs, enhancing the flow of your essay.
Supporting Examples
Provide more specific examples or evidence to support your points. This strengthens your argument and makes your essay more persuasive.
Accuracy & Support
Avoid overgeneralizations and ensure that claims are supported with credible sources or logical reasoning.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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