One of the consequences of improved medical care is that people are living longer and life expectancy is increasing. Do you think advantages outweigh disadvantages?

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People
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are living longer and their
life
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expectancy is increasing; these are some of the consequences of
improves
Wrong verb form
improved
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medical
care
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.
Therefore
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, the population of humans is increasing. In my attitude, the advantages of living longer perfectly outweigh the disadvantages. In
this
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essay, I will discuss aspects of the two main mentioned consequences of population growth; long living of
people
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and
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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of
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apply
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life
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expectency
Correct your spelling
expectancy
.
Firstly
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, living for a long time is one of the dreams that humans have been looking for.
Development
Correct article usage
The development
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of medical
care
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has helped
people
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in order to live longer. Reaching higher levels in
life
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is an advantage to long living.
However
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, long living may lead to a wide range of disadvantages
such
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as the lack of enough accommodation and nutrition.
Secondly
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,
life
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expectency
Correct your spelling
expectancy
has increased
due to
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the progressed medical
care
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. If
people
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have hope in their lives,
life
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will be much more jovial for them.
Therefore
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, humans will be able to optimize their lives .
Additionally
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, thankfully, there is no disadvantage to the purpose of living longer.
To sum up
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, I have discussed two mentioned outcomes of progressed medical
care
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.
Although
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there are some drawbacks
of
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to
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this
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purpose, the benefits meaningfully outweigh them.
Submitted by miladmousavi757 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • consequences
  • improved medical care
  • life expectancy
  • advantages
  • disadvantages
  • healthcare
  • quality of life
  • population
  • economic burden
  • elderly
  • dependency
  • technology
  • ethical concerns
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