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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The three charts below show the value in Australian dollars of Australian trade with three different countries from 2004 to 2009. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.

The three charts below show the value in Australian dollars of Australian trade with three different countries from 2004 to 2009. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information below.
#three #show #value #australian #dollars #trade #countries #report #university #lecturer #information
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The line graphs depict information about the
value
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 of Australian money,
trade
Correct word choice
and trade
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 with three nations namely
Chijna
Correct your spelling
China
,
Japan
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 and
United
Correct article usage
the United
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states
Capitalize word
States
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 during the year between 2004and 2009.The data
measured
Add a missing verb
is measured
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 in the form of billions.
Overall
Linking Words
,
trade
Change preposition
in trade
show examples
 with China, the monetary
value
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 was increased,
while
Linking Words
 the deals with
Correct article usage
the united
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united states
Correct your spelling
United States
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maintained
Verb problem
were
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constantly
Change the word
constant
show examples
 and
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Japan
Change noun form
Japan's
show examples
 commerce activities declined the currency
value
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 of the nation. Looking at the graph in detail,
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Australia
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Australia's
show examples
 commerce activities with China, in 2004, around 10
billion
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 dollars
earned
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were earned
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 through exports, but imports
eraned
Correct your spelling
earned
the
Correct article usage
apply
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double
Wrong verb form
doubled
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 the
value
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 of exports and that accounted
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 20
billion
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, during the period from 2005 to 2008, there was a significant increase in exporting and importing.During the final
year
Add a comma
,year
show examples
Australia
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 earned higher income through exporting and that accounted for 30
billion
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 dollars.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
Australia
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 deals with
Japan
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, in 2004, the earning of import and export stood at 20
billion
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 in 2004.
Subsequently
Linking Words
, the export was slightly upward
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 following years and it
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
reached
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
peakpoint
Correct your spelling
peak point
breakpoint
in2008
Correct your spelling
in 2008
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it was just below
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
40
billion
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 dollars.
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Australia
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Australia's
show examples
impotrs
Correct your spelling
imports
 goods from
Japan
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 remained
same
Correct article usage
the same
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 and that accounted for 20
billion
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.
However
Linking Words
,
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australia
Change noun form
australia's
show examples
 trade with America earned
Correct article usage
a costant
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costant
Correct your spelling
constant
 amount of income through exporting and importing.
Submitted by jibinjoshi763 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words value, japan, australia, billion with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "graphs" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 2 times.
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