In recent years, many small local shops have closed because customer travel to large shopping centres or Malls to do their shopping. Is this positive or a negative development?

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It is a fact that
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of going to small shops, people are more inclined towards shopping malls.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will discuss by enlightening on some factors and illustrating their benefits and drawbacks.
To Begin
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with its benefits, there are numerous reasons why people want to go to the commercial centre rather than a tiny shop.
Firstly
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, consumers can get any essential household items, quality in clothing
as well as
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

necessary electronic items under one roof.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, twice a year, they offer huge
concession
Fix the agreement mistake
concessions

It seems that concession may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
on products during summer and in the winter.
Last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

but not least, plazas save your time and at the same time your energy as well.
Furthermore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if consumers want to buy any vital item, they indeed prefer mini-mart
instead
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of the little store
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, shops with huge
deduction
Fix the agreement mistake
deductions

It seems that deduction may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
for instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, if buyers want to purchase a white formal shirt for office purposes, vendors will have a plethora options of for it.
In addition
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, they get 20% discounts if they purchase more items,
whereas
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

small shops have limited options with no decrease
on
Change preposition
in

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
products. coupons and
exemption
Fix the agreement mistake
exemptions

It seems that exemption may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

show examples
are always attracting the crowd. If consumers are getting everything under one roof why do they prefer to go shop to shop in summer, especially when the outside temperature is 40 degrees Celsius
.
Change the punctuation
?

Consider using a question mark to signify that this sentence is a question.

show examples
To conclude
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, there are numerous benefits of shopping from big shopping centres rather than the local market,
however
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, it provides variety with premium quality in clothing, huge rebate and save your money as well time
therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, mini-marts are more in trend which is a positive change.
Submitted by monica.duhan2 on

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Introduction and Conclusion
Your introduction lacks a clear thesis statement and does not effectively introduce the main points of your essay. Make sure to clearly outline your position and the main points you will be discussing in the essay.
Logical structure and Coherence
Your essay has some logical structure and flow, but there are areas where the connection between ideas is not clear. Try to use transition words and phrases to link your ideas more clearly and ensure the logical flow of your argument.
Task Achievement
You need to ensure that your essay fully addresses the question prompt and provides a comprehensive discussion of the topic. Furthermore, use relevant and specific examples to support your points and strengthen your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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