children are facing more pressures nowadays, from academic, social and commerciale perspectives.What are causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

#children #pressures #commerciale #perspectives #measures

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It is irrefutable that today's

children

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are pressurised and are facing academic, social and commercial challenges. There are a number of reasons and solutions for

this

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occasion, which will be highlighted in the next paragraphs. It is an undeniable fact that

children

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are under pressure from

parents

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who always want their

children

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to excel in every field.

Therefore

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, they send

children

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to extra lessons live English, Russian and their mother tong tongue as

parents

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think that

such

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classes will help them to find a rewarding position by opening many avenues for their future, Undoubtedly

children

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go to schools, where school bags are heavier than themselves, which means they have excessive homework tasks,

as a result

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, they don't have enough time to bloom and show their hidden talents. though

Moreover

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parents

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force

children

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to follow traditions that

children

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extremely hate. Without a doubt,

this

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causes

children

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to rebel against rules laid by

parents

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, so relationships between

parents

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and

children

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get progressively worse day by day. What is more, nowadays commercial perspectives are experienced by

children

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For example

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, when

children

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see their peers who have luxury items.They

also

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want to

posses

Correct your spelling

possess

show examples

such

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things and ask their

parents

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to purchase them for them. When

parents

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say that they can't afford to buy costly items

due to

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financial difficulties

Children

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get stressed.The solutions are very simple despite these challenges.First of all,

parents

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should understand their

children

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to be talented in every field in

this

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world. They should encourage them to spend more time in classes that they are interested in

Furthermore

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, The biggest onus is on The school and teachers to solve social and commercial issues as They should organize sports competitions for

children

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as a result

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, they allocate time to the sport which can help them reduce their pressure, related to finance And socializing with their

parents

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. То sum up it can be reiterated that academic, social and financial measures are experienced by

children

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. The causes and measures were discussed above.

Submitted by ieltsteaching0 on Sat Oct 07 2023

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task achievement

Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your ideas.

coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear introduction and conclusion. Make sure to include these in your essay.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

328 words

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children are facing more pressures nowadays, from academic, social and commerciale perspectives.What are causes of these pressures and what measures should be taken to reduce these pressures?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people think that fittest and strongest individuals and the team can achieve success in sports, while others believe that success depends on mental attitude. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important for children’s development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?

The title "I had to show courage." Describe a circumstance where you had to exercise courage. What action of yours required a lot of bravery? Afterwards, did you feel proud of yourself? How did your surroundings respond?

Do you think that technological advancement has brought more harm than good? Use specific reasons and details to support your answer.

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development?