Some people belive that culture will be ruined if it used to earn tourism revenue ,but others consider that tourism is the only way of protecting culture.Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
A controversial discussion is whether
culture
should be used to earn money
or not.Despite the writer considering tourism
to play a critical role in improving the beauty of cultures,some people
say it is extremely wrong to use it as a tool for wealth.
On the one
hand,it is argued that the sole way to protect the beauty of culture
is the tourism
industry.We have no difficulties in understanding why.Nowadays,the tourism
industry is growing higher and higher,its
effects are significant and enormous , Correct word choice
and its
specially
in how it advertises Replace the word
especially
one
thing.Cultural activity only can survive if it attracts young people
to learn and teach it to the next generations in the future. To attract young people
, we should make culture
showing Correct article usage
a culture
become
a profitable job because no Verb problem
apply
one
can do an unpaid job for a long time.For example
,after watching a series films
named “The Story of Yanxi Palace,fans of that film have become interested in the Change preposition
of films
culture
of Chinese and still curiously want to travel to that historical palace in China although
they have to pay a lot of money
for slots.
Returning to the other opinion. Some people
feel angry when traditional activities are used as a good to sell for money
. .
It is vital to understand why.Replace the punctuation
.
...
Culture
is a symbol of one
nation.Therefore
it shows one
ethnic group’s customary beliefs, social forms, and material traits of a racial, religious, or social group and was made and completed by the hand of artists after hundreds
years of history. That group of Add the preposition
hundreds of
people
said those cultures are too blessing that people
can not use money
for a look.
The writer supports tourism
because of
Change preposition
for
the
two reasons.Correct article usage
apply
To begin
with, with the revenue from traditional shows, artists can present better performances in order to retain the quality of cultural activities and satisfy the client as well.Many young artists nowadays find inspiration from the traditional culture
.For instance
, a Vietnamese fashion designer Chau Bui brought Vietnamese culture
in her special outfits,which she wore in three days at a famous fashion show in Paris and it has impressed her all over the world.Furthermore
,tourism
helps people
gain knowledge about one
culture
and realise how important that.
As an example,young children learn History at school and respect that Add a missing verb
is.
culture
,they also
know how to protect them truly.
In conclusion, culture
is an indispensable part of any country as protecting and developing culture
are our sacred jobs. To do so, I believe the best way is showing
traditional Change the verb form
to show
tourism
so that our culture
is well known all over the world and our artist have income to keep their job and pass it on our future generations.Submitted by [email protected] on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly states the topic and provides an overview of the main points that will be discussed.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples and evidence to support your points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.