Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others belive that some imformation is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In the contemporary era of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cutting-age
Correct the spelling
cutting-edge
show examples
technology , people have become surrounded by a myriad of
information
Use synonyms
sources. It is often argued that sharing
such
Linking Words
date
Correct your spelling
data
show examples
linked with scientific
resreach
Correct your spelling
research
, business and
acadimic
Correct your spelling
academic
aspects should be
confidenial
Correct your spelling
confidential
and restricted,
while
Linking Words
some scholars contend that these kinds of
information
Use synonyms
resumably
Correct your spelling
presumably
to be in
puplic
Correct your spelling
public
to support others in
study’s
Change noun form
study
show examples
disciplines.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss both perspectives and I believe that sharing
information
Use synonyms
plays a crucial role for different reasons, albeit with saving copyrights. To embark on, there is a common consensus that it is not
plausibl
Correct your spelling
plausible
plausibly
to spend years of studies and research
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
allow others to get
this
Linking Words
information
Use synonyms
readily. Apart from that, regarding
bussiness
Correct your spelling
business
, companies’ data are confidential and any entrepreneur should not expose their
information
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
anyone, and they should secure
this
Linking Words
private
information
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, sharing financial files, private accounts and
information
Use synonyms
related to internal affairs poses a considerable threat to the
intities
Correct your spelling
entities
identities
when their
competents
Correct your spelling
competitors
get
this
Linking Words
information
Use synonyms
.
Thus
Linking Words
, the
consept
Correct your spelling
concept
of sharing privacy is unacceptable. In sharp contrast, it is absurd that restricting
such
Linking Words
infromation
Correct your spelling
information
can return with utility to a plethora of people. The pragmatic purpose of academic studies and research is to raise awareness,
reinforece
Correct your spelling
reinforce
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
intellectually and boost
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humanity.
Therefore
Linking Words
, there is not any compelling reason to deter sharing beneficial
information
Use synonyms
due to
Linking Words
its valuability.
For instance
Linking Words
, the proliferation of diseases is a pressing concern for people,
Linking Words
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
by emerging
platfoms
Correct your spelling
platforms
of
medical
Correct article usage
the medical
show examples
aspect, they become able to search for the correlated thesis, research evidence and most efficient
laboratoraies
Correct your spelling
laboratories
along with
Linking Words
healthcare places in the world.
That is
Linking Words
why, the availability of trusted
infromation
Correct your spelling
information
is essential owing to its advantages .
To conclude
Linking Words
, there are
oppositing
Correct your spelling
opposing
opposition
views of sharing
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
quinessential
Correct your spelling
quintessential
data.
Date
Correct your spelling
Data
show examples
is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
precious and private and exhibiting it can harm
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
its owner
such
Linking Words
as a
companies
Change noun form
company's
show examples
information
Use synonyms
, from the other hand, it is important to share that imperative knowledge to promote public awareness and subsidy other scholars in their studies stream.
Submitted by alaan0542 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Response
Task Response: Improving task achievement by presenting a more balanced and focused argument. Address both perspectives more explicitly and elaborate on the position taken.
Coherence and Cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: Enhance the logical structure by organizing ideas and ensuring clear introduction and conclusion. Use cohesive devices to connect ideas and maintain paragraph unity.
Lexical Resource
Lexical Resource: Expand vocabulary range and choose appropriate academic and formal terms. Work on precision and accuracy in word choice for better expression of ideas.
Grammatical Range
Grammatical Range: Improve sentence structures, avoid errors in subject-verb agreement, and use a wider variety of sentence patterns for better grammatical range.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: