65.Some people think that success in life comes from hard work and determination, while others think that there are more important factors such as money and appearance. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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There are two different
point
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points
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of view
of
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on
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how to
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success
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succeed
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in
life
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.
First,
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that
the
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apply
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success
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in
life
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comes from
ones
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one's
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determination and
hardwork
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hard work
,
while
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the other view
think
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thinks
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that there
are
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is
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much more variable that can
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depend
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depends
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depends on
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ones
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one's
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success
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,
such
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as
appearance
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and money. Undoubtedly,
hardwork
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hard work
will not betray the result,
says
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say
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some
people
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.
Furthermore
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, when
someone
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is having
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has
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a strong determination, it will be difficult
to
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for
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anyone to stop him from reaching his goals. By working hard and
have
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having
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a strong
determanation
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determination
, ones will likely find their
cuccess
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success
in
life
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in a short of time.
Nevertheless
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, there are
also
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another
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other
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factors that can affect
someone
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's
success
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in
life
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, and
usually
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usually,
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someone
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who
have
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has
show examples
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this
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these
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factors
are
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is
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someone
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whom having a privilege
such
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as
rich
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a rich
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or
well known
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well-known
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family.
Someone
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with
such
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privileges will indeed receive more money and relation that will help their
stair way
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stairway
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to
cuccess
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success
than others that are not. Nowadays, many
people
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treat
someone
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accordind
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according
to their
appearance
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, especially visual
people
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, and having a good
appearance
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Linking Words
also
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is also
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one of the
privilege
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privileges
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that can
someone
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have. In conclusion, hard work and determination obviously have
impact
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an impact
the impact
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to
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on
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someone
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's
cuccess
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success
in
life
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, but for other
people
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that are born with
prifileges
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privileges
,
such
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as money and
appearance
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,
there
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it
show examples
will be
more
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apply
show examples
easier for them to find
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
success
Use synonyms
in
life
Use synonyms
.
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task achievement
Clearly state your opinion in the conclusion.
task achievement
Add more specific examples and explanations to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Organize your ideas in a more logical manner.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary.
grammatical range accuracy
Make sure to use correct grammar and sentence structures.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • discipline
  • resilience
  • effort
  • tenacity
  • external factors
  • financial resources
  • favorable appearance
  • perceptions
  • advantages
  • intrinsic
  • extrinsic
  • sustainable
  • facilitating
  • undeniable
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