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Band 4.5

Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child’s development while others think that it is important for children to go to school. Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.

#people #children #home #child’s #development #school #methods
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"Learning at home is more useful for
children
Use synonyms
 in their
developed
Replace the word
development
show examples
." Some people say, but others
thinks
Change the verb form
think
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study
Wrong verb form
studying
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 and
teach
Wrong verb form
teaching
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 at
school
Use synonyms
 is more crucial for
children
Use synonyms
. In my opinion, attention to
positive
Correct article usage
the positive
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impacting
Fix the agreement mistake
impacts
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 of going to
school
Use synonyms
 must not
ignore
Wrong verb form
be ignored
show examples
 in
Use synonyms
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. On the one hand, considering the disadvantages of
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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not
attendance at
Wrong verb form
attending
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school
Use synonyms
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
student can be prevented
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
 some harmful
impacted
Replace the word
impacts
show examples
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their
life
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, when the
children
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 are not studying at
school
Use synonyms
, they will not
available
Correct word choice
be able
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 to more understand their
lesson
Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
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. It is that
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 the
students
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 can increase their awareness and knowledge with their
classmate
Fix the agreement mistake
classmates
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,
due to
Linking Words
ask
Change the verb form
asking
show examples
different
Add an article
a different
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 creative
question
Fix the agreement mistake
questions
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 between teacher and other
students
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, so,
children
Use synonyms
`s knowledge can
be risen
Change to the active voice
rise
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;
otherwise
Linking Words
, when they
training
Wrong verb form
train
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 alone, it cannot
happened
Change the verb form
happen
show examples
 probably.
Secondly
Linking Words
, their relationship will be affected
of
Change preposition
by
show examples
 their method of teaching alone or
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
group
Correct article usage
a group
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
, training in a group for laboratory
lesson
Fix the agreement mistake
lessons
show examples
 is more enjoyable than alone, so
created
Wrong verb form
creates
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 a friendly relationship between them.
Finally
Linking Words
, the
students
Use synonyms
 consistently, have had competition at
school
Use synonyms
 ,
as well as
Linking Words
, a student
Correct pronoun usage
who want
show examples
want
Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
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 to learn alone ,certainly cannot acquire the best result. From my point of view, these disadvantages are not ignorable, because of
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 awful affected.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, beneficial training for
children
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happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
 at
school
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, because of its sufficient
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
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 and facilities , that the
students
Use synonyms
 can utilize them leniently .
For instance
Linking Words
, playing team
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
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 in the yard of the
school
Use synonyms
 will be more enjoyable for
student
Fix the agreement mistake
students
show examples
 than at home alone. Using the facilities
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the laboratory with
students
Use synonyms
 and their supervisor is possible at
school
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
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 because there is not
this
Linking Words
 kind of equipment at home.
On
Change the preposition
In
show examples
 my opinion,
the
Correct article usage
apply
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parents can
more
Correct quantifier usage
apply
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encourage and
growth
Replace the word
grow
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 their
children
Use synonyms
`s talent
by
Change preposition
through
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 their choices in kind of education alone or team.
Furthermore
Linking Words
 teaching ,the social communication created at
school
Use synonyms
 and society. In conclusion, the choice
place
Change preposition
of place
show examples
o
Change preposition
to
show examples
 teach
children
Use synonyms
 with their parents is a lot crucial for them ,because of its
impacted
Change the form of the verb
impact
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of
Change preposition
on
show examples
children
Use synonyms
 `s
life
Use synonyms
 in during their education and their
Use synonyms
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
. It will be important in their communication
an
Correct your spelling
and
show examples
 level of their knowledge.
Submitted by Pegahghaderi85 on

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • personalized learning
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  • safe learning environment
  • bullying
  • peer pressure
  • socialization
  • diversity awareness
  • structured environment
  • discipline
  • punctuality
  • resources and facilities
  • communication skills
  • teamwork
  • specialized subjects
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