Failure is a proof that the desire wasn’t strong enough. To what extent do you agree?

It has been argued that unluck is a lack of discipline or laziness in mind. I totally agree with that opinion of the several reasons and examples discussed in that essay.
To begin
with, failure is not just the reason for giving up and nowadays, people do not have enough patience and a strong mentality to achieve success in their
life
.
For instance
, Eddy Tompson was the first inventor of light and many other scientific achievements. His closest friends were telling media, that Eddy had thousands of attempts to create the first lamp and perseverance in his
life
that allowed him to generate electricity. Nobody discusses his previous failures, anyway, only strong desire and belief in himself contributed to those achievements.
Furthermore
, there are many modern professionals who become champions and the best in their aspect by discipline and lack of laziness.
For example
, Khabib Nurmagomedov
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
the UFC champion without any defeats in his career, claims that the discipline and strict father in his
life
were the main reasons for his success. Many individuals give up when they have not even started and do not try hard to get something in
life
. Consistency is the most necessary part, and more importantly, some people do not want to continue what they are doing because they do not understand why they even started. I think many segments of societies do not have confidence and understanding of the purpose of their goals,
that is
why they can not achieve them.
To conclude
, quitting is becoming more and more acceptable for young generations thinking it is normal when they should have tried harder than they did.
Submitted by filwayy on

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coherence cohesion
Expand on the reasons and examples mentioned to further support your points.
lexical resource
Provide more varied and specific vocabulary to enhance your lexical resource.
grammatical range accuracy
Use a wider range of sentence structures and avoid repetitive phrases.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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