Some people think that museum should be enjoyable place to entertain people while others believe that the purpose of them is to educate.discuss both views and give your opinion..
Nowadays,plenty of facilities give fun and some individuals think that
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
also
should be atraching
,Correct your spelling
attaching
however
,opinion
of others Correct article usage
the opinion
that
the main goal of Add a missing verb
is that
museum
is to educate.I Add an article
the museum
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
purpose
of Correct article usage
the purpose
museum
should guide Add an article
the museum
a museum
people
than
to enjoy.
Rephrase
rather than
Firstly
,such
places as museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
iclude
Correct your spelling
include
variety
of ancient items,Correct article usage
a variety
history
books,which are significantly valuable,can not be funny.Correct word choice
and history
Also
,if people
were get
fun there,it would be Verb problem
to have
such
as simple entertainment palce
.For Correct your spelling
place
instanse
,Correct your spelling
instance
mostly
Correct your spelling
most
people
go there to familiarize themself with either culture
or Correct article usage
the culture
history
of Correct article usage
the history
museum
Fix the agreement mistake
museums
about
.Those,I think it is not Change preposition
apply
entertaiment
consuming place,it is Correct your spelling
entertainment
area
where persons search for some unique times of history or something similar.
Add an article
an area
the area
Secondly
,it is not relevant about
carry Change preposition
to
of
special information about events and ancient Change preposition
apply
time
.Fix the agreement mistake
times
Make
Wrong verb form
Making
museum
Correct article usage
a museum
as
place for enjoying could lead Correct your spelling
a
wrong
consequences,Change preposition
to wrong
such
as to aceept
Verb problem
accepting
this
main data as joke
or unbeneficial trash.For Add an article
a joke
exaple
,if Correct your spelling
example
people
gone
to play there,it would be Add the auxiliary verb
went
have gone
unserious
site to study in Correct article usage
an unserious
this
discipline.Afterwards,In my opinion museum
is nessecary
Correct your spelling
necessary
to
Change preposition
for
individual's
degree and for Correct article usage
an individual's
sciense
.
In conclusion,museums include more Correct your spelling
science
education
items rather than Replace the word
educational
entertainments
and Fix the agreement mistake
entertainment
such
places carry important data.I belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
museum
places are made up to
Change preposition
for
development
of Add an article
the development
degree
.Fix the agreement mistake
degrees
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite