IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The idea of having a single career is becoming old fashioned one. The new fashion will be to have several careers or ways of earning money and further education will be something that continues throughout life.

#idea #career #fashion #careers #money #education #life
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Since the world has changed,
people
Use synonyms
 have to adjust their
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
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 to be able to survive in our world nowadays. Granted that
people
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 having only one stable
job
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 is enough.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
, it is an old fashioned
thoughts
Correct the article-noun agreement
thought
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 as
in
Change preposition
apply
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these days, everything can happen
any
Change preposition
at any
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 time either bad
things
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 or good
things
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, so it’s unable to be denied that having many careers as alternatives is a really good idea. In the past,
people
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 thought that having one stable occupation
is
Wrong verb form
was
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 enough for them to live as they got paid
in
Change preposition
at
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 an adequate level, but nowadays,
people
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 don’t want just enough for living. Notwithstanding
people
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 have enough
money
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for living
Change preposition
to live
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, their desire is unlimited, so they want to earn as much
money
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 as possible to satisfy themselves by purchasing
things
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 they want.
Also
Linking Words
, the price of goods is a lot
more
Correct word choice
higher
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 compared to the past, so the
money
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 they earn from
the
Change the word
their
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 only
job
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of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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is not enough. As everyone knows, it is unpredictable what is going to happen in the future, so some
people
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 probably have second and third
way
Fix the agreement mistake
ways
show examples
 of earning
money
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.
Hence
Linking Words
,
incase
Correct your spelling
in case
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 something bad happens, and it makes them lose their main
job
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, they have the other way to make
money
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 and be able to buy the
things
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 they need. In a nutshell, it is impossible that
people
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’s notion would be mutual, so it literally depends on the person
that
Correct word choice
apply
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how many ways of earning
money
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 they want to have and for what purpose.
However
Linking Words
, it is well known that thoughts of having more than one
job
Use synonyms
is
Change the verb form
are
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 more popular nowadays owing to many factors.
Submitted by dondollaraus on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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