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Band 5

Some people think that what children watch on television will influence their behavior. Others think that the time they watch television influences their behavior most .Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #children #television #influence #behavior #time #influences
These days many
children
 spend their
time
 on
television
. So, some people think that what
children
 watch on
television
 will influence their
behaviour
 .
While
 others believe that the
time
 they watch
television
 influences their
behaviour
 most.
This
 essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal conclusion. On one hand, what kids watch on TV affects their attitudes. it can affect the nature of their
behaviour
.
For
example
Add a comma
example,
show examples
 it is possible for kids to imitate what they see and be influenced by it , and they may become irritable and maybe see something that
not
Add a missing verb
is not
show examples
 appropriate for their age. So,
that is
 why some think that what
children
 watch will influence their
behaviour
.
On the other hand
, others believe that the amount of
time
children
 spend on
television
 is what affects their
behaviour
.
This
 can affect many aspects of the child.
for instance
, when
children
 sit in front of the
television
 for a long
time
 can damage their physical and mental health.It is
also
 possible that the child may become isolated and antisocial.That's why some people think how much
time
children
 spend watching
television
 affects them. In conclusion, after a careful analysis of both points of view, I believe that both opinions are correct and convincing. What they watch and the
time
children
 spend on
television
 all affect their personalities, behaviours, and sometimes even their health and physical conditions.
Submitted by Ethar Ali  on

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task achievement
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coherence cohesion
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lexical resource
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grammatical range accuracy
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Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

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