Some students choose to take a gap year after graduating high school to work and/or travel. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

#students #gap #year #school #work #travel

Recently, there has been a popular trend among

students

that they are going to temporarily postpone advancing in their learning path to work or to take a break by travelling. In my opinion,

this

is not a wise decision and a major setback that they should really consider before doing it. On the one hand, taking a gap year can be appealing to

students

because it can give them a sense of freedom.

For example

, most

students

are constantly monitored by parents.

Thus

, having a gap year can offer them a chance to not only do whatever suits them without anyone complaining but

also

to prove that they are independent enough to deal with the challenges that life throws at them.

On the other hand

, despite the appealing benefits that I have mentioned above,

this

trend

also

has many demerits. First of all, being able to earn money early may make

students

think that higher education is unnecessary without knowing that the knowledge they gained in high school is by no means enough to guarantee a stable job in the future.

This

is because most companies nowadays usually require a range of certificates to make sure that the candidate is knowledgeable enough in order to perform well and benefit their company.

Hence

, a person who does not meet those requirements may have to accept a low-paid job or face unemployment.

As a result

, they may face financial difficulties in their lives and may become depressed that they are willing to commit fraudulent or illegal acts to survive.

To sum up

although

having a break before entering university can bring about some benefits, they are overshadowed by the drawbacks.

Thus

students

need to consider the advantages and disadvantages of

this

trend carefully before making their decisions.

Submitted by weezel on Fri Oct 13 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

Ensure that your essay has a clear and logical structure throughout. This involves planning your paragraphs effectively and using clear topic sentences to indicate the main point of each paragraph.

Coherence and Cohesion

Include a concise introduction and conclusion that clearly state your opinion and summarize your main points. Currently, your introduction could be more focused, and your conclusion should reiterate your view more conclusively.

Task Achievement

Provide specific and relevant examples to support your main points. These examples are crucial in making your arguments compelling and credible.

Task Achievement

Work on expanding and exploring your main ideas comprehensively. Ensure that each paragraph expands on the central idea introduced in the topic sentence with sufficient detail and depth.

Task Achievement

Address the task directly and make sure to cover all parts of the prompt thoroughly. In this case, discuss both advantages and disadvantages equally and explain why one outweighs the other, supporting your argument with clear justifications.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

295 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some students choose to take a gap year after graduating high school to work and/or travel. Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages?

Fully explain your ideas

While many people go to university for academic study, more people should be encouraged to do vocational training because there is a lack of qualified workers such as electricians and plumbers. Do you agree or disagree?

These days, children have easy access to home computers, tablet computers, and smartphones, and many spend a large part of their free time using these devices. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this situation and give your own opinion.

Billions of dollars are being wasted on space research. The money used could be better if used to improving condition on people on earth. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities to work can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems and what measures can be taken to solve this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

In order to be successful at a sport, some think you must be physically strong while others believe mental strength is more important. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.