IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Nowadays, more people would rather purchase food than cook at home. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this trend?

These days, an increasing number of individuals prefer buying ready-made
meals
Use synonyms
instead
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 of preparing
food
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 at home.
This
Linking Words
 trend comes with both benefits and drawbacks, which I will
further
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 explain in
this
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 essay. On the
on
Use the right word
one
show examples
 hand,one clear advantage of buying
food
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 from
restaurants
Use synonyms
 is the convenience it offers in terms of time. For individuals with busy schedules, especially those who struggle to prepare
meals
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 at home, dining out becomes an appealing alternative. Another reason why restaurant or cafeteria
food
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 is growing in popularity is the wide variety of meal options available.
In other words
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, customers are attracted to the freedom of choosing from multiple dishes, which is particularly valuable for families. When dining together, each family member can select their preferred meal, ensuring that everyone is satisfied.
On the other
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hand
Add a comma
hand,
show examples
 there are clear disadvantages to regularly relying on restaurant
meals
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.
Firstly
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, the
food
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 served may pose
health
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 risks. Many
restaurants
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 use artificial ingredients or excessive spices to enhance
flavor
Change the spelling
flavour
show examples
, some of which can be harmful to the human body.
As a result
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, unsuspecting customers may suffer from various
health
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 issues after consumption.
For instance
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, a recent study conducted in Lagos State, Nigeria, revealed that most
food
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 vendors use aspartame—a sweetener linked to
health
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 conditions
such
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 as hypertension and kidney disease.
Secondly
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, eating out is often more expensive than preparing
meals
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 at home. Over time,
this
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 can place a significant financial burden on individuals who frequently dine at
restaurants
Use synonyms
. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 buying
food
Use synonyms
 from
restaurants
Use synonyms
 can be convenient and time-saving, it
also
Linking Words
 comes with significant disadvantages. Regular consumption of restaurant
meals
Use synonyms
 may lead to
health
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 problems
due to
Linking Words
 high levels of fat, sugar, and salt.
Additionally
Linking Words
, relying on takeout or dining out frequently can become financially burdensome in the long term.
Therefore
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,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
 trend may offer short-term benefits, its negative effects should not be overlooked.

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grammar
There are many small errors in grammar that slow the flow. Check 'On the on hand' and use 'On the one hand' with a comma.
coherence
Linking words are good but use a clear order when you give pros and cons. Use words like 'first', 'next', 'however', and 'in addition' for a smooth flow.
examples
Give real, clear examples that are easy to check. The Lagos study is not clear. Use well known facts or simple, own examples.
task
Make a clear finish that fits the task. Sum up the two sides with a short final line.
lexical resource
Use simple words and keep to common terms. Do not use too long or hard words that you are not sure about.
strength
The idea that both sides are shown is clear.
strength
The text is easy to follow and parts are well linked.
strength
Good use of pros and cons in many parts.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Convenience food
  • Time-efficient
  • Culinary skills
  • Dietary habits
  • Takeout culture
  • Meal prep
  • Fast food
  • Home-cooked meal
  • Nutritional value
  • Consumerism
  • Family dynamics
  • Cultural heritage
  • Food industry
  • Ready-made meals
  • Eating out
What to do next:
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