16.The pie charts show the revenue sources and expenditures of a children’s charity in the USA in one year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

16.The pie charts show the revenue sources and expenditures of a children’s charity in the USA in one year. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The pie charts below display the income and waste of a charity
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
Correct your spelling
children
childrens
Correct your spelling
children
show examples
in a year in the United States
Overall
, there are more earnings than
spendings
Fix the agreement mistake
spending
show examples
. Food had the biggest profit, followed by community contributions,
while
program services had the highest expenditures. About the income, donated food had 86.6% of the
overall
share, the next biggest earnings comes from the community contribution with a little more than one-tenth of the portion, specifically, 10.4%. Program revenue only contributed to a small part, with 2.2%,
while
investment income and government occupied only 0.2% each, and the rest 0,4% comes from other profits. There are three main spendings, where the program services occupied almost all the expenditures, with 95.8%. Fundraising had a proportion of only 2.6% of the
overall
paying out,
while
management and general wastes were 1% less than fundraising.
Finally
, the total earning was $53,561,580
while
the waste was 53,224,896, so there
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
around
300 000
Correct your spelling
300,000
more revenue than expenditures.
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall, while".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: