IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

in some countries , owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people

#countries #home #people
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In today’s society, owning a
home
Use synonyms
 is
one
Use synonyms
 of
ultimate
Add an article
the ultimate
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 goals for
people
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, so its importance is increasing than renting a
home
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. Some
people
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 think it has more
benefit
Fix the agreement mistake
benefits
show examples
 and I agree with
this
Linking Words
 point of view based
what
Change preposition
on what
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 I will explain about its positive situation in
this
Linking Words
 essay.
Firstly
Linking Words
, building a family is something really important to some
people
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 in their
20’s
Change noun form
20s
show examples
 or
30’s
Change noun form
30s
show examples
 especially in developing countries. In order to
that
Add a missing verb
do that
show examples
, a family need their own
home
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 to make it more comfortable and
also
Linking Words
 for their identity in society.
Moreover
Linking Words
, owning a
home
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 is a form of investment and some
people
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 think it will be profitable in the future. They
also
Linking Words
 do not need to pay the bill monthly or yearly
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 does not make them
owning
Wrong verb form
own
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 the asset.
For instance
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,
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
research by an economic organization in Southeast Asia shows that property is
one
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 of the most profitable
investment
Change to a plural noun
investments
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 in the
last
Linking Words
 5 years.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, renting a
home
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 is the fastest way for a new family to live in a house. They can choose the best location and other
specification
Fix the agreement mistake
specifications
show examples
 based on their needs. They do not have to think a lot because it
just
Add a missing verb
is just
show examples
temporary
Correct article usage
a temporary
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 place to live, but they can choose the best
one
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 without
pay more
Wrong verb form
paying as much
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 as if they
buy
Wrong verb form
bought
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 it.
This
Linking Words
 situation usually
apply
Change the verb form
applies
show examples
 to
people
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 who have an occupation that
require
Correct subject-verb agreement
requires
show examples
 them to move in a period of time. In conclusion, the decision about owning a
home
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 or renting
is depend
Wrong verb form
depends
show examples
 on
people
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’s
need
Fix the agreement mistake
needs
show examples
 and situation but if they have more budget, owning a
home
Use synonyms
 is better than renting
one
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by hafizahnazir on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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