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Band 4.5

33.Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviours. Other disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

#people #visitors #countries #customs #behaviours #host #country #differences
Some say that when
individuals
 travel, they should respect the culture of those places,
while
 others believe that
people
 should accept and welcome other
civilazation
Correct your spelling
civilization
 and their way of thinking.
This
 essay would argue that
although
 experiencing other cultures can allow
people
 to know more, humans should accept how
individuals
 are. On the one hand, following local customs and thoughts will allow
people
 to learn and know more about how
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
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people
 live in those places. So the tourists can enjoy activities that the country does
in
Change preposition
on
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an
Correct article usage
a
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especial
Correct your spelling
special
show examples
 date and feel
like
Correct word choice
as
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 if that was their country, so they can have better experiences.
And at
Correct word choice
At
show examples
 the same time,
this
 will allow
people
 to be aware of protecting cultures and history that it is followed only by a small number of
people
.
For example
, in
China
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China,
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 there are many minority ethnic groups, each of them with different
type
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types
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 of traditions, but most of the Chinese
people
 do not know what
dot
Verb problem
apply
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the others really do,
then
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so
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 the possibility of letting
people
to
Change the verb form
apply
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dress and follow their culture makes
people
 to remember the existence of those minority ethnic groups exist.
However
, I believe that
this
 can be a way of learning, but do not need to be mandatory
On the other hand
, since the world is increasingly globalized, there are too many
people
 travelling from one place to another, and sometimes they may stay in other nations. Most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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individuals
 follow different cultures and religion, and
this
 is because of religious
believes
Replace the word
beliefs
show examples
 or their national tradition, so they have been following it all their lives,
then
,
this
 need to be respected even if they are in other
countries
,
this
 will show that the country is open and friendly to every type of
people
.
For instance
, European
countries
 have a lot of citizens that come from other nations, in some Asian
countries
individuals
 are obligated to cover their hair and in others their
face
Fix the agreement mistake
faces
show examples
,
also
 most
of
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apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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Indian
people
 do not eat beef because
the
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apply
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cows are sacred
for
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to
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 them. In Europe
this
Change the determiner
this person
these people
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people
 are allowed to do what they want, if that were not the case,
then
 there
will
Wrong verb form
would
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 not be a bond between
countries
. I believe
this
 point of view is preferable because
this
 will allow a better relationship between all
countries
 and
peopel
Correct your spelling
people
 in the world. In conclusion,
although
 following
religions
Correct article usage
the religions
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 of other
countries
 can make the tourists feel
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
at home,
people
 should welcome everyone that
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 different culture and customs since we are in a globalized world.
Submitted by elenazheng1211 on

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Your opinion

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...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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