In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this positive or negative development. Give reason for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Nowadays, there are many people living in the
countryside
and
Correct word choice
who
show examples
decide to move to urban areas, which leads to a decreasing number of populations in the
countryside
. I personally believe that
this
trend is totally harmful. One quite serious problem that can result from leaving the
countryside
to move to cities is air pollution.
In particular
,
due to
the significant increase
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
city dwellers,
this
tendency may create a greenhouse effect, which is
causes
Fix the agreement mistake
cause
show examples
of the disease as well. To exemplify
this
point,
according to
multitude
Add an article
a multitude
the multitude
show examples
of
researches
Fix the agreement mistake
research
show examples
, erratic weather conditions will create
favorable
Change the spelling
favourable
show examples
environments that contribute to the development of harmful bacteria for a long time. Another issue which should not be overlooked is that moving to metropolitan areas uncontrollably
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is more likely to make food an imbalance situation. To illustrate
this
point, it leads to a decreasing
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
decline in the production of agricultural outputs.
For instance
,
due to
the lack of agricultural human resources to grow rice and fruit trees, people living in the nation must struggle with a shortage of food.
As a result
, leaving rural residences is able to influence food security in a negative way.
Besides
, the one of advantages brought to rural's lives is that they may access
many
Replace the quantifier
much
show examples
useful knowledge. To explain, because cities
where
Rephrase
apply
show examples
contain universities and institutes, which is
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
place to study.
For example
, they can study more new agricultural technology,which
really
Add a missing verb
is really
show examples
harmful to their career. In conclusion, the trend of leaving the
countryside
for urban cities seems to be
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
unfavorable
Change the spelling
unfavourable
show examples
progress is damaging implications for society, human health and life quality. In my opinion,
this
tendency has a negative effect.
Submitted by yeshomeclass on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: