Addition to the internet is a wide spread problem. What problems does it cause? What is a suitable solution?

#addition #internet #spread

The number of

people

who are addicted to the

Internet

is increasing.

This

trend has big impacts on

people

health

and

people

relationships

in real life, yet it can be solved by the

government

which should curb the time for residents to use the

Internet

. The first problem that affects them is the decline in physical

health

and mental

health

. It must be considered that green light on smartphones or laptops will damage

people

's skin and eyes.

Furthermore

, when users surf the

internet

, they will be envious of others’s lives and self-deprecating about their bodies, lifestyles and qualifications.

As a result

, not only physical issues but

also

mental issues become more serious and

people

will withdraw from society.

This

is true in Vietnam where there are lots of

internet

addicts, many reports show that misusing the

internet

is the main cause of vision problems and depression. The second principal problem is spoiled

relationships

in real life. It must be recognised that when abusers just chat with others, the lack of communication skills is increasing.

Consequently

people

do not talk to family or friends, the

relationships

become distant and arguments happen more often.

For instance

, teenagers in Vietnam always chat with friends

although

they are face to face.

However

, a solution can be found

is that

Verb problem

show examples

the

government

should limit the time for

people

to use the

internet

. The most effective method is that authorities pass a strict law and fine

people

breaking the law. If residents overuse the

Internet

, they will be fined, so that users will obey the rule. Taking China as an example, the

government

banned Chinese children from abusing the

internet

in 2022.

Thus

, being addicted to the

internet

will affect physical

health

, mental

health

and it will damage

people

’s

relationships

Nevertheless

, if the

government

can curb the time of using the

internet

, the problem could be solved.

Submitted by 11E4 Community on Sun Oct 15 2023

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task achievement

Include a thesis statement in the introduction to clearly state your position.

task achievement

Expand on the impact of internet addiction on people's health and relationships.

coherence cohesion

Organize your ideas into clear paragraphs.

lexical resource

Use a wider range of vocabulary to improve your lexical resource.

grammatical range accuracy

Check your grammar and sentence structures for errors.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

310 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

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Addition to the internet is a wide spread problem. What problems does it cause? What is a suitable solution?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Nowadays, more people are becoming overweight. Some people think that the solution is to increase the price of fattening food? To what extent do you agree or disagree.

Scientists agree that many people eat too much junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Many people in poor countries die from diseases that are curable because they cannot afford the medication required. Do you believe that drug companies should make their products available at reduced prices in these countries?

In recent times, many people have focused on the negative effects advertising has on children’s health, behaviour and family relationships. Advertising to children should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Companies should provide sports and social facilities for local communities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?