People should plan for their retirement by saving money. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #plan #retirement #money

Nowadays,

people

are working in order to secure their

future

and to have a stable source of income. I strongly agree that

Remove the comma

apply

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future

planning by saving finances should be done so that individuals can enjoy the fruit of their labour after they retire.

Firstly

, a retirement plan is of

the

Correct article usage

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paramount importance because

human

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the human

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body is not at its prime in

the

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old age and working can get overwhelming.

Moreover

, health is at a decline as an individual grows old which can render them prone to disease.

For instance

, many

people

include health insurance and nursing care provisions in their

retiral

Replace the word

retirement

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plans just because of

this

reason so they can be assured that they will be fine if

such

problems arise.

Secondly

, a regular source of income is

very

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apply

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vital so that

people

can relax and they do not have to worry about how to meet their basic necessities.

For example

, pension schemes for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

retired workers.

Furthermore

, a continuous annuity

such

this

supports all these needs and most

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the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

retiree

Fix the agreement mistake

retirees

show examples

enjoy travelling,

thus

people

should start investing towards their

future

when they are still working to enjoy all these perks later when they are no longer youthful and energetic.

To sum up

, retirement planning for the

future

should be done as it is an assurance of a secured

tommorrow

Correct your spelling

tomorrow

. There are many benefits that

comes

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come

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along with

it which are required when

people

are no longer young. It

also

liberate

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liberates

show examples

them from the obligations of working in their elderly years.

Submitted by Beebleei on Sun Oct 15 2023

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Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

253 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

financial security
peace of mind
comfortable living standard
compound interest
unexpected expenses
financial stress
well-funded retirement
government pensions
retirement benefits
cost of living
economic uncertainties
financial discipline

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People should plan for their retirement by saving money. Do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

There is a problem with the changing rooms in the sports centre that you visit. You have complained several times but with no success. •describe what the problem with the changing rooms is • say what happened the last times you complained • explain what you want the manager to do.

Some people today prefer to get advice for medical problems from the internet and do not want to visit a doctor. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

Some people are making new friends by socializing network websites and internet chat rooms. Some people say that this is a good thing. Other people opine that people should make new friends by face to face chat. Discuss both views and given your own opinion.

in many countries, the quality of life decline in large cities. why? how to solve this matter