IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The restoration of old buildings in major city throughout the world would involve enormous expenditure. This money would bring more benefits if it was used to provide new housing and road development. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Many
buildings
Use synonyms
 around the world are aging and as they age, the more costly it gets to keep these structures standing.
Thus
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
 some resources, the alternative of constructing new houses and other infrastructure lines would be a better investment. It is my firm belief that there are certain
buildings
Use synonyms
 that must be restored regardless of huge maintenance expenses
due to
Linking Words
 their strategic and historic value,
however
Linking Words
,
instead
Linking Words
 of maintaining the other old
buildings
Use synonyms
 without any value, new construction projects can be executed.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, there are two major reasons that make financial sense to restore certain old
buildings
Use synonyms
. There are many ancient
buildings
Use synonyms
 that bear historical and architectural importance. Because of that these
buildings
Use synonyms
 are protected and the governments incur massive amounts of expenses to maintain them.
In addition
Linking Words
 to that some of those
buildings
Use synonyms
 have the capability to amortize their expenses by being a hotspot for touristic activities.
Besides
Linking Words
 the cultural and architectural importance of
buildings
Use synonyms
, some outdated
buildings
Use synonyms
 are located at the center locations in major cities,
thus
Linking Words
 demolishing and building a new one is not possible
due to
Linking Words
 many obvious reasons.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, sometimes restoration of old
buildings
Use synonyms
 is not the silver bullet in solving the aging infrastructure problem. Generally, the maintenance process required to restore the old structure is tedious and financially burdensome,
therefore
Linking Words
, demolishing them is a pragmatic solution.
For instance
Linking Words
, as the restoration of a building is utterly expensive, the money can be spent on building new houses
as well as
Linking Words
 contributing to other infrastructure like roads and railways.
To sum up
Linking Words
,
although
Linking Words
 maintaining old
buildings
Use synonyms
 is as expensive as building a new one, some monumental structures like the Eiffel Tower and the Red Bridge must be restored despite the huge refurbishment bills because they have immense historical value as they are now representing attributes of the countries.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Provide a clearer position in the introduction.
coherence cohesion
Ensure a logical and coherent structure throughout the essay.
task achievement
Add more specific examples to support your points.
coherence cohesion
Develop a stronger introduction and conclusion.
lexical resource
Use formal language and avoid contractions (e.g., it's, can't).
grammatical range and accuracy
Check your grammar and make sure to use correct verb tenses.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: