The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems? What measures can be used to solve these problems?

#movement #people #areas #cities #places #measures

To move

Change preposition

apply

show examples

people

from the countryside to urban places for work brings out crucial issues in both areas.

This

essay first discusses the unemployment problems of dwellers living in agricultural zones and

then

suggests possible solutions to them.

To begin

with, it's a well-known fact that the majority of developed

cities

, especially capital

cities

, are places where the main workplaces are gathered,

whereas

there aren't any in the villages.

This

due to

the fact that a great many universities, far higher-level state bodies, and the most enormous companies are located in these

cities

Therefore

, the

youngs

Correct your spelling

young

show examples

from these regions are coming so as to get an education,

build

Correct word choice

and build

show examples

their own lives and careers here because of

having

Verb problem

are

show examples

much

Fix the agreement mistake

many

show examples

more job opportunities.

As a result

this

leads to

such

problems as overcrowding, contamination, congestion in towns, and the desolation of villages.

According to

the results of a study conducted

last

year in Bulgaria, only 13

people

live in Peshtera village, which had a population of more than 700 in the 1990s.

Secondly

, as an answer to

this

problem, both states and entrepreneurs must take certain steps.

Following

this

, by moving some of the workplaces located in

cities

to out-of-town areas, the government can reduce the load on

cities

as well as

create new jobs for residents in the villages.

Along with

the state authorities, the big companies, by launching start-ups, help to provide employment for

people

from these regions and to improve there. To exemplify, Agali village in Zangilan, by applying the idea of

smart

Add an article

a smart

show examples

village, creates relevant conditions for many

people

. In conclusion, unemployment is one of the main causes of

people

moving from agricultural places, and government and private sector representatives can work together to solve it.

Submitted by semabayramova00 on Mon Oct 16 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Task Achievement

Develop a stronger introduction and conclusion that provide clear summaries of the main points.

Task Achievement

Include more relevant and specific examples to support your ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion

Organize your ideas more coherently by using clear paragraph divisions.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to enhance your lexical resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Pay closer attention to grammar and sentence structure to improve grammatical range and accuracy.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

14Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

290 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers, Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
In the last decade, the technology of Artificial Intelligence has grown significantly. Consequently, more and more facilities get this option in order to make easier life. One of these items is a smart automobile which is designed to carry one without any driver. In this essay, I will examine the drawbacks and benefits of it and introduce my point of view.
6
band
Many employees can now do their work from home using modern technology. However, this change may only benefit workers, not the employers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In the contemporary era, working from home tends to be a new working style due to the significant development of digital technology. Although some believe that this tendency could gain only advantages for employees, not the employers, I disagree with this point because business proprietors could save money by maintaining offices or workers might reduce working pressure.
5
band
New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?
In the future, space tourism will be probably popular. Today, there are a lot of companies give opportunity to become a space tourist such as Space X, Virgin Galactic and others. In my opinion, it is positive development but with clarification. People should not lose focus for some actual problems.
7.5
band
Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?
These days, overseas travel is getting popular in all countries. Many people, especially youngsters, like to spend a lot of time travelling in hard places. However, there are both pros and cons to doing this. In this essay, I will discuss some of the reasons why travelling places are getting popular and some of the challenges to be overcome.
5
band
Scientists agree that many people eat too mucch junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion
Lots of researchs illustrate that there is an increase in population consuming fast food, which affects negatively on their health. Whether this matters can be dealt by education or not is a controversial topic. Although many people argue that this solution is possible, this writer opposes this opinion due to service and addictive substances of junk food.

The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems? What measures can be used to solve these problems?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers, Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Many employees can now do their work from home using modern technology. However, this change may only benefit workers, not the employers. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

New technologies have changed the way children spend their free time. Do you think the advantages of this trend outweigh the disadvantages?

Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourists who visit such places?

Scientists agree that many people eat too mucch junk food and it is damaging their health. Some people think that this problem can be solved by educating people, while others believe that education will not work. Discuss both views and give your opinion