The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems? What measures can be used to solve these problems?

#movement #people #areas #cities #places #measures

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To move

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apply

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people

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from the countryside to urban places for work brings out crucial issues in both areas.

This

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essay first discusses the unemployment problems of dwellers living in agricultural zones and

then

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suggests possible solutions to them.

To begin

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with, it's a well-known fact that the majority of developed

cities

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, especially capital

cities

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, are places where the main workplaces are gathered,

whereas

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there aren't any in the villages.

This

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due to

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the fact that a great many universities, far higher-level state bodies, and the most enormous companies are located in these

cities

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Therefore

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, the

youngs

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young

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from these regions are coming so as to get an education,

build

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and build

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their own lives and careers here because of

having

Verb problem

are

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much

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many

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more job opportunities.

As a result

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this

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leads to

such

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problems as overcrowding, contamination, congestion in towns, and the desolation of villages.

According to

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the results of a study conducted

last

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year in Bulgaria, only 13

people

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live in Peshtera village, which had a population of more than 700 in the 1990s.

Secondly

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, as an answer to

this

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problem, both states and entrepreneurs must take certain steps.

Following

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this

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, by moving some of the workplaces located in

cities

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to out-of-town areas, the government can reduce the load on

cities

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as well as

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create new jobs for residents in the villages.

Along with

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the state authorities, the big companies, by launching start-ups, help to provide employment for

people

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from these regions and to improve there. To exemplify, Agali village in Zangilan, by applying the idea of

smart

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a smart

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village, creates relevant conditions for many

people

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. In conclusion, unemployment is one of the main causes of

people

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moving from agricultural places, and government and private sector representatives can work together to solve it.

Submitted by semabayramova00 on Mon Oct 16 2023

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Task Achievement

Develop a stronger introduction and conclusion that provide clear summaries of the main points.

Task Achievement

Include more relevant and specific examples to support your ideas.

Coherence and Cohesion

Organize your ideas more coherently by using clear paragraph divisions.

Lexical Resource

Expand your range of vocabulary to enhance your lexical resource.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy

Pay closer attention to grammar and sentence structure to improve grammatical range and accuracy.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

290 words

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The movement of people from agricultural areas to cities can cause serious problems in both places. What are the serious problems? What measures can be used to solve these problems?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Many criminals commit further crimes as soon as they are released from prison. What do you think are the causes of this? What effect will this have on society?

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctors. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?