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Writing Samples
Band 6

The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations, during 2010-2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The graph below gives information about the number of Catholics residing in different nations, during 2010-2013. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
#information #catholics #nations #summarise #features #comparisons
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The given bar graph illustrates
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
how many
Catholic
Use synonyms
people
Use synonyms
 live in six countries (China, India,
Philiphines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
, Vietnam, Korea and Japan) from 2010 to 2013.
Overall
Linking Words
,
according
Add the preposition
according to
show examples
this
Linking Words
 chart most
Cathalic
Correct your spelling
Catholic
people
Use synonyms
 in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 and the least
people
Use synonyms
 live in Japan. In 2010 and 2013 the highest
Correct quantifier usage
number of Chatholic
show examples
Chatholic
Correct your spelling
Catholic
people
Use synonyms
 in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
,
75,940,000
Add a missing verb
were 75,940,000
show examples
 and 72,000,000 respectively, but the figures showed
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 Catholics in 2013. India is
next
Correct article usage
the next
show examples
 highest country, in 2010 it was 10,570,000 and in 2013
number
Add an article
the number
a number
show examples
 of Catholics grew up to 19,000,000, in 2013,
number
Change the article
the number
show examples
 of
people
Use synonyms
has
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
almost doubled. In both years, Vietnam Catholics population
closely
Add a missing verb
was closely
show examples
 equal, in 2010, 5,590,000 and in 2013, 5,321,168, anyhow,
Use synonyms
Catholic
Correct article usage
the Catholic
show examples
 number of
people
Use synonyms
 dropped in Vietnam in 2013.
Similarly
Linking Words
,
Korea
Change preposition
in Korea
show examples
also
Linking Words
Catholic
Use synonyms
popultaion
Correct your spelling
population
 reduced, in 2013 clearly
we
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can see
Correct article usage
a considerble
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considerble
Correct your spelling
considerable
considerably
 dropped it was 1,319,190 and in 2010 it was 5,270,000. Japan had the least
Catholic
Use synonyms
 population, which
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
accounted
at
Change preposition
for
show examples
 400,000 in 2010 and in 2013, 509,000.
Submitted by piuymi.madu on

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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words catholic, people with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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