The chart below shows the percentage of households owning four types of electronic devices between 1995 and 2015. Summarise the information by selecting and report in the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

#percentage #households #four #devices #summarise #information #report #features #comparisons

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In the

Change preposition

The

show examples

line graph

is presented

Wrong verb form

presents

show examples

the

percentage

Use synonyms

of households with different electronic devices from 1995 to 2015.

Overall

Linking Words

, the graph presents the evolution of the usage of

differente

Correct your spelling

different

electronic devices with time.

For

Linking Words

instance

Add a comma

instance,

show examples

the mobile phone was not commonly used in 1995,

this

Linking Words

has changed, as it became one of the two most used electronic devices in 2015. The same thing

ocurred

Correct your spelling

occurred

Change preposition

with

show examples

the computer,

this

Linking Words

device has a similar evolution to the mobile phone,

thus

Linking Words

they both started at approximately 7% to 8% of owning and ended in 95% of

housholds

Correct your spelling

households

in 20 years. The mobile phone was the device heading the

percentage

Use synonyms

growing during

mostly

Correct your spelling

most

show examples

of the time,

on the other

Linking Words

hand

Add the comma(s)

hand,

show examples

MP3 player did not present any

enlargment

Correct your spelling

enlargement

during

this

Linking Words

years.

Linking Words

Lastly

Add a comma

Lastly,

show examples

the tablet did not have any

apperiances

Correct your spelling

appearance

until 2003, despite

this

Linking Words

, it showed

Change the article

show examples

increment

beetween

Correct your spelling

between

the years 2007 and 2015 to

finally

Linking Words

end up at an imposing

percentage

Use synonyms

of 81%.

To conclude

Linking Words

, It is known that the

tecnology

Correct your spelling

technology

has evolved with time to become what we know today.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the evolution

showed

Wrong verb form

shown

show examples

this

Linking Words

chart

let

Correct subject-verb agreement

lets

show examples

visualice

Correct your spelling

visualise

visualize

the

increasment

Correct your spelling

increase

Use synonyms

percentage

Add an article

the percentage

show examples

of householding

electronical

Correct your spelling

electronic

gadgets.

As a

Linking Words

result

Add a comma

result,

show examples

we can see that the elements with the major

increasment

Correct your spelling

increase

are mobile phones and computers.

Submitted by khushiaggarwal255 on Tue Oct 17 2023

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words percentage with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "presented" was used 3 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

▼

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
23
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

212 words

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News stories on TV and in newspapers are very often accompanied by pictures. Some people say that these pictures are more effective than words. What is your opinion about this? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

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You stayed at a hotel to attend a company meeting and you were dissatisfied with your stay. Write a letter to the hotel manager. In your letter – Provide the details of your meeting – Explain what you were dissatisfied with – Suggest what the hotel should do to resolve the issue.

The plans below show how the ground floor of a particular building has changed over time. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Some people think that employers should not care about the way their employees dress because what matters is the quality of their work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?