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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

24.The chart below shows percentages of people choosing different ways to reduce greenhouse gases in four different countries in 2005. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

24.The chart below shows percentages of people choosing different ways to reduce greenhouse gases in four different countries in 2005. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The bar graph displays the proportion of ways individuals used to decrease greenhouse gases in Portugal,
Poland
Use synonyms
,
Estonia
Use synonyms
 and
Holland
Use synonyms
 in 2005.
Overall
Linking Words
, the way that Portugal citizens use the most is by government regulations,
while
Linking Words
Poland
Use synonyms
’s is a lifestyle, and the other two nations mainly employ advanced technologies. In Portugal, 40% of people utilize government regulations to reduce the number of greenhouse gases,
while
Linking Words
 in
Poland
Use synonyms
 only approximately 27%, which is nearly 10% more than
Estonia
Use synonyms
,
finally
Linking Words
,
Holland
Use synonyms
 had just under 15%.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, lifestyle has 30% in Portugal and
Poland
Use synonyms
 and 10% in
Estonia
Use synonyms
 and
Holland
Use synonyms
. 30% of people applied advanced technology in Portugal,
Holland
Use synonyms
’s value was three as much as the lowest, namely
Poland
Use synonyms
, which only had a portion of 10%,
while
Linking Words
Estonia
Use synonyms
 doubled
Poland
Use synonyms
.
Finally
Linking Words
, In
Poland
Use synonyms
 and
Estonia
Use synonyms
 around 26% and 15% respectively, employed other ways to reduce the gases that are not named, Portugal and
Holland
Use synonyms
 had one-fifth of people using other methods.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally, while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words poland, estonia, holland with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "reduce" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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