Some say that advertisements of snacks and toys have a great impact on children and their parents. So, the advertisement to children should be banned. Do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Advertisement
Use synonyms
toys and snacks have significantly increased over the years. Many people believed that it has a substantial influence on
kids
Use synonyms
and adults and voiced out that these
adverts
Use synonyms
should be banned. In
this
Linking Words
essay, I will talk about why I agree with banning the
advertisement
Use synonyms
of toys and snacks. To start with, advertisements have been improving over the
last
Linking Words
few decades. Marketing agents have utilised various ways of advertising from TV
adverts
Use synonyms
,
radio
Fix the infinitive
to radio
show examples
and newspapers. There are plenty of
adverts
Use synonyms
that are directed to children
such
Linking Words
as toys, snacks and clothing brands.
This
Linking Words
can negatively impact
kids
Use synonyms
as they can copy and engage in unhealthy habits, attempt dangerous stunts and develop materialistic feelings.
For example
Linking Words
, children who often see advertisements about sugary cereals marketed to their age group
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
will tend to ask their parents to buy said cereal for them.
This
Linking Words
is harmful, as it enables
kids
Use synonyms
to have an unbalanced meal for breakfast.
Also
Linking Words
, parent-child conflict has increased
due to
Linking Words
the rise of
adverts
Use synonyms
that target
kids
Use synonyms
8 years and below.
This
Linking Words
is
due to
Linking Words
the
kids
Use synonyms
feeling left out or throwing a tantrum for not getting what they wanted. On the other, some
advertisement
Use synonyms
illustrates healthy habits that can help in encouraging
kids
Use synonyms
to exercise.
For example
Linking Words
, in the Philippines, Milo has an
advertisement
Use synonyms
that depicts the drink as the drink of the Olympians.
This
Linking Words
type of
advertisement
Use synonyms
can help encourage
kids
Use synonyms
to play sports or incorporate exercise into their daily routine.
Also
Linking Words
, advertising to
kids
Use synonyms
can help them learn various topics in an age-appropriate manner.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I reaffirm my position in banning advertisements as it significantly impacts all ages , especially
kids
Use synonyms
because of the negative impacts and consequences it creates.
Submitted by estillorericamae on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Try to further develop the counterargument to provide a more balanced view before concluding with your opinion.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph has a clear central idea and sufficiently supports it.
task achievement
Add a few more relevant, specific examples to strengthen the points. This will help provide more concrete evidence for your arguments.
task achievement
The essay effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both sides of the argument before concluding with a clear position.
coherence cohesion
The introductory and concluding paragraphs are well-defined, setting up the essay and summarizing your stance effectively.
task achievement
Good use of a specific example, such as the sugary cereals and the Milo advertisement, to illustrate your points.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: