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Writing Samples
Band 7

Shopping is the favourite pastime for most of the young people. Why do you think is that? Do you think they should be encouraged to do some other useful activities?

#favourite #pastime #people #activities
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In today's consumer-driven society, shopping has emerged as a favourite hobby among young people.
This
 essay will explore the reasons behind
this
 trend and discuss whether it is essential to encourage them to engage in other productive
activities
. There are several factors contributing to the popularity of shopping among young people. One significant reason behind
this
 is the influence of advertising and social media. Advertisers cleverly employ persuasive techniques to create
desire
Add an article
a desire
the desire
show examples
 for products, leading young individuals to feel a constant need to shop. The accessibility of online shopping platforms and attractive deals
also
 contribute to
this
 phenomenon.
Moreover
, shopping offers a
sense
 of instant gratification and accomplishment.
Furthermore
, the act of shopping itself can provide a temporary
sense
 of
fulfillment
Change the spelling
fulfilment
show examples
 and escape from daily stressors, making it an appealing leisure activity.
While
 shopping can be an enjoyable activity, it is important to encourage young individuals to engage in more useful and well-rounded pursuits. Spending excessive time and money on shopping can lead to financial issues and contribute to a shallow
sense
 of self-worth based on material possessions. Encouraging participation in
activities
 like sports, cultural events, volunteering, or pursuing educational and personal development can provide a more balanced and fulfilling life. These
activities
 promote physical fitness, social interaction,
personal
Correct word choice
and personal
show examples
 growth, and contribute positively to the community. In conclusion, shopping has become a popular pastime for young people
due to
 the influence of advertising, easy accessibility, and the
sense
 of immediate gratification it provides.
Nevertheless
, it is crucial to encourage them to explore other productive
activities
 that can foster personal growth and contribute to the community. Striking a balance between shopping and alternative interests can lead to a more well-rounded and fulfilling life for the younger generation.
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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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