Some people believe that family is more important than friends. To what extent do you agree and disagree?
It has been observed that most
people
believe that family plays a vital role than their friends. I fully agree with this
viewpoint. In this
essay, I will explore the factors that result in this
trend, followed by possible reasons to explain this
phenomenon.
To begin
with, a plausible interpretation of this
phenomenon is the economic development that has occurred in recent decades. As the economy flourishes, people
can access a wide range of social opportunities and activities they can select and acquire. To satisfy their social aspirations and demands, they prioritise friendship to secure stronger social relationships. For example
, most friends do not judge you, they provide a safe and comfortable environment for sharing emotions. When you need them, they can offer you different suggestions or resolutions. Additionally
, they can provide alternative ideas or solutions.
On the other hand
, it is undeniable that caring about family members is a commendable behaviour that can generate positive outcomes for individuals and society. This
behaviour manifests a sense of family responsibility and highlights a humanitarian spirit. Thereby, family member’s mental happiness will be satisfied. At the same time, the incidence of social problems will be reduced. For example
, everyone relies on their families from childhood, and they support you financially and emotionally, influencing people
in many ways. When people
make mistakes, their family is usually the first to forgive them.
In conclusion, family support can be incredibly valuable for anyone, as long as they need it. While
friends play a crucial role in people
's lives, they cannot replace the importance of family.Submitted by taotao_0203 on
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Task Achievement
Provide a clear thesis statement in the introduction to indicate your stance on the issue.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas and provide more supporting evidence for your points.
Coherence and Cohesion
Organize your essay in a logical manner, with clear topic sentences for each paragraph and smooth transitions between ideas.
Lexical Resource
Expand your vocabulary and use more advanced lexical phrases to improve the overall quality of your writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy
Pay attention to sentence structure and punctuation to enhance grammatical accuracy.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite