In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
For decades, the enthusiasm for urbanization has been enhanced by rural inhabitants. Lately, there has been a sharp decrease in the population of villages.
While
Linking Words
it poses both advantages and disadvantages, I strongly agree that
this
Linking Words
growing trend is a negative development. On one hand, migration to urban cities provides an improved opportunity for education and employment among youngsters. It is well-known that most
Change preposition
of
show examples
the children living in the countryside suffer from basic knowledge
such
Linking Words
as literacy and numeracy,
therefore
Linking Words
migration to capital cities will enhance their accessibility to a better quality education. Chairul Tanjung,
for instance
Linking Words
. Prior to his career as an Indonesian minister, he was an exceptional student who had been taken to the Indonesian capital
city
Use synonyms
, Jakarta
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
and became successful in operating his business.
As a consequence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
prevalent perspective has a positive effect on children from rural areas,
thus
Linking Words
giving a helping hand to a more educated society.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
ongoing trend leads to
an
Remove the article
apply
show examples
increased pressure on urban resources and services. As the population becomes overcrowded in the
city
Use synonyms
, the existing infrastructure struggles to keep pace with the growing demands of its residents.
This
Linking Words
strain resulted in increased traffic congestion and inadequate housing options. To illustrate, several cities have fallen to
this
Linking Words
condition, including Jakarta and Bangkok.
As a result
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
situation will threaten the
city
Use synonyms
's sustainability. In conclusion, despite the upward trend of migrating to metropolitan areas, strained services provided by the
city
Use synonyms
remain a formidable challenge. Since the infrastructure cannot meet the uplifting demand, amenities become unable to operate effectively.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
perspective brings more drawbacks rather than benefits.
Submitted by annisasdn on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
Provide more specific examples to support your points about the advantages and disadvantages of rural to urban migration.
coherence cohesion
Ensure that your introduction and conclusion clearly state your position on the topic.
lexical resource
Use a wider variety of vocabulary throughout your essay.
grammatical range accuracy
Consider using a wider range of sentence structures and more complex grammatical constructions.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • rural-to-urban migration
  • population shift
  • positive impact
  • negative impact
  • urbanization
  • job opportunities
  • access to education
  • access to healthcare
  • urban infrastructure
  • rural traditions
  • cultural heritage
What to do next:
Look at other essays: