IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

The parents of your Australian friend Chris have invited you to a surprise birthday party for him. Write a letter to Chris's parents. In your letter . Say why you think Chris will enjoy the surprise party . Explain why you won't be able to attend the party . Give details of a plan to see Chris at a different time

#parents #australian #friend #chris #surprise #birthday #party #plan #time
Dear Mr and Madam Brown I hope to find you well. I thank you for inviting me to Chris's birthday. Certainly, surprise would be the most effective action for everyone. From my point of view, Chrise would be so happy when he
face
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 surprise, because he always tells me, that having a birthday celebration lack of knowing about it, is so wonderful.
Hence
, he consistently wants to have it. I mentioned to you, on that date, I have a crucial interview for an employee in a new job that I have been waiting for it a long time.
Hence
,if I am going to attend your event, unfortunately will miss it immediately. So, I apologize to hear that cannot participate in your event. Certainly, I am going to hold a friendly party for Chris in our friend's cafe` after your celebration, by reason of, I do not want to spoil your surprise. I hope you consider my condition. Spending the most effective times with each other is what I want for you. Yours sincerely Souri
Submitted by Pegahghaderi85 on

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The logical structure needs improvement to provide a clear and cohesive flow of ideas. The greeting and closing could be more appropriate and formal. The response contains a single main idea, but the development of this idea needs improvement. The writing tone is somewhat suitable, but could be more consistent.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
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