IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #families #country #income #summarise #features #comparisons
The bar graph illustrates how households in a country divided their weekly budget into several basic expenses from 1968 to 2018.
Overall
, money spent on food
exhibited
Verb problem
was
show examples
 the most significant spending item in 1968 which
replaced
Add a missing verb
was replaced
show examples
 as first rank by spare time activities
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
50 years later. The vast majority of
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
experienced
Add a missing verb
was experienced
show examples
 by the category of housing, transport, and free time activities. Housing nearly doubled its proportion from 10% to just below %20 of weekly income.
In addition
, transportation spending
also
 saw a likely increase but reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
roughly 15% in 2018. Ultimately, the ratio of leisure activities expanded its size from about 10% to more than 20% between 1968 and 2018. The remaining areas demonstrated a noticeable drop throughout the period, except household goods. Its ratio stayed constant at below 10%. In 1968, the food expenditure of a household
roughly
Add a missing verb
was roughly
show examples
 one-third of the total income.
On the other hand
, it dramatically
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 to approximately 17%. The remaining items
such
 as energy, personal expenses or garments experienced a downward trend. Their proportions decreased by 5-1% in the period of 50 years.
Submitted by historicalpen on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • compare
  • spending patterns
  • allocated
  • weekly income
  • significant changes
  • essential items
  • food
  • housing
  • clothing
  • leisure
  • communication
  • increase
  • decrease
  • twofold rise
  • substantial increase
  • quadrupling
  • declined
  • food and drink
  • slight increase
  • prioritizing
  • necessities
  • transitioned
  • portio
  • non-essential items
What to do next:
Look at other essays: