IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below gives information about how families in one country spent their weekly income in 1968 and in 2018. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#information #families #country #income #summarise #features #comparisons
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The bar graph illustrates how households in a country divided their weekly budget into several basic expenses from 1968 to 2018.
Overall
Linking Words
, money spent on food
exhibited
Verb problem
was
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 the most significant spending item in 1968 which
replaced
Add a missing verb
was replaced
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 as first rank by spare time activities
after
Change preposition
apply
show examples
50 years later. The vast majority of
Correct article usage
the increase
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increase
Correct article usage
the increase
show examples
experienced
Add a missing verb
was experienced
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 by the category of housing, transport, and free time activities. Housing nearly doubled its proportion from 10% to just below %20 of weekly income.
In addition
Linking Words
, transportation spending
also
Linking Words
 saw a likely increase but reached
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
roughly 15% in 2018. Ultimately, the ratio of leisure activities expanded its size from about 10% to more than 20% between 1968 and 2018. The remaining areas demonstrated a noticeable drop throughout the period, except household goods. Its ratio stayed constant at below 10%. In 1968, the food expenditure of a household
roughly
Add a missing verb
was roughly
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 one-third of the total income.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it dramatically
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
show examples
 to approximately 17%. The remaining items
such
Linking Words
 as energy, personal expenses or garments experienced a downward trend. Their proportions decreased by 5-1% in the period of 50 years.
Submitted by historicalpen on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "ratio" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "roughly" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • compare
  • spending patterns
  • allocated
  • weekly income
  • significant changes
  • essential items
  • food
  • housing
  • clothing
  • leisure
  • communication
  • increase
  • decrease
  • twofold rise
  • substantial increase
  • quadrupling
  • declined
  • food and drink
  • slight increase
  • prioritizing
  • necessities
  • transitioned
  • portio
  • non-essential items
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