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Band 6.5

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.

The graph gives information about the percentage of the population if four different Asian countries living in cities between 1970 and 2020 with additional predictions for 2030 and 2040. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and making comparisons where relevant.
#information #percentage #population #four #asian #countries #cities #predictions #features #comparisons
The linear graph illustrates the volume of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
urban residency in four Asian countries from 1970 to 2020,
along with
 the prediction for 2030 and 2040. Calibration of data is done in percentages. Looking from an
overall
 perspective, it is readily apparent that
population
Correct article usage
the population
show examples
 in
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
, Malaysia,
Indonesia
 and
Thailand
were
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased
between
Change preposition
during
show examples
 the given time period. In the future,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in urban cities in
Malasia
Correct your spelling
Malaysia
was
Wrong verb form
will be
show examples
 ranked first place.
To begin
 with, in 1970, urban residency in Malaysia and
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 was at one third nearly.
However
, at the
beggining
Correct your spelling
beginning
,
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
population
 in
Malasia
Correct your spelling
Malaysia
just
Add a missing verb
was just
show examples
 beneath
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Indonesia
 and it was just passed
Pilippines
Correct your spelling
Philippines
 and dramatically wii be increased to 80%
at
Change preposition
by
show examples
 2040.
Then
,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in
Malasia
Correct your spelling
Malaysia
was fluctuated
Change to the active voice
fluctuated
show examples
 until 2010 and after that slightly increased and it is predicted to 55% in 2040. The
population
 in
Thailand
 and
Indonesia
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
climbed
pararally
Correct your spelling
partially
para rally
 through
Correct article usage
the frist
show examples
frist
Correct your spelling
first
 two decades.
Subsequently
,
Indonesia
Change noun form
Indonesia's
show examples
polupation
Correct your spelling
population
 was over
taked
Correct your spelling
taken
Thailand
 in 2000 and
Philippines
Correct article usage
the Philippines
show examples
 in 2010.
Finally
, in 2040,
population
Add an article
the population
show examples
 in
Indonesia
 will be ranked
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 second place. The residency percentage of
Thailand
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
grew dramatically in the given period and it will be shown the lowest
persentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 in 2040.
Submitted by shanikamaduri on

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Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Vocabulary: Replace the words population, indonesia, thailand with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatically" was used 2 times.
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