IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #attention
People
 have different views about whether these days advertising can attract society to buy something or it has no longer an effect on them.
While
advertisements
 are useful and can attract
people
's attention, I believe that nowadays
due to
 the variety of colourful
advertisements
,
people
 have no particular reaction to them. On one hand, because of the variety of the same products that are produced by several factories, a creative advertisement can significantly affect
people
's minds and push them to pay for the advertised goods.
Furthermore
, a new and innovative way of showing a
product
such
 as vibrant billboards in bustling streets or holding lotteries can help to increase the sales of a company's goods.
For instance
, in Iran, a factory which produces dairy products
,
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 distributes small packets of curd among
people
 in crowded streets and shopping malls. So, it helped them to introduce their factory and their productions to
people
 from all walks of life, and now they are popular among the Iranian community by their special way of advertising.
On the other hand
, advertising can not persuade
people
 to buy a good or their necessities from a particular brand. Rather, it is a quality of an end
product
 of a company, which is important for consumers.
Also
, in my opinion,
people
 are the best means of advertising for a
product
. Because whenever an individual buys a good, the satisfaction with that
product
 can turn him/her into a permanent customer.
Moreover
,
this
 person can attract many customers to that factory by informing his/her relatives or friends. So, an employer should prioritize the quality of their productions over their
advertisements
. In conclusion, I can understand why some
people
 believe in the extreme effects of
advertisements
, but it seems to me that concentrating on the quality of products is much more effective.
Submitted by z.rajabi on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
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lexical resource
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

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Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • persuade
  • promote
  • attract
  • influence
  • impact
  • consumerism
  • commercialism
  • market
  • product
  • brand
  • endorsement
  • manipulative
  • saturated
  • overwhelmed
  • repetitive
  • distracting
  • irrelevant
  • exaggerated
  • misleading
  • desensitized
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