IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmes (for example working for a charity, improving the neigbourhood or teaching sports to younger children). To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #community #service #part #school #programmes #charity #neigbourhood #sports #children
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In the
contamporary
Correct your spelling
contemporary
 era, voluntary
Use synonyms
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
 are good
signs
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sign
show examples
 of
stable
Correct article usage
a stable
show examples
 and harmonic society. That's why some people think that it is supposed to be obligatory in high schools. I think that
such
Linking Words
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
work may be optional and not compulsory, but I still think that it is very important to speak about the effect of these
works
Use synonyms
 from the early education period.  Unpaid community services may
contrebute
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contribute
 a lot
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the whole age
sections
Fix the agreement mistake
section
show examples
 in each society,
hence
Linking Words
, some may think that it should
ba
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
 a part of high school
scheduales
Correct your spelling
schedules
.
For instance
Linking Words
, when I was a teenager, our teachers asked
as
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us
show examples
 to go over around the school and ask people to donate money for
the
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apply
show examples
cancer's
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cancer
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 patients. It was a very good experience
to
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for
show examples
 me and from
early
Add an article
an early
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 age I have learned that helping others for free may add a huge value to my life. 
On the other hand
Linking Words
, I think that pupils
shold
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should
 not be
compulsated
Correct your spelling
complicated
compensated
 to do
shuch
Correct your spelling
such
Use synonyms
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
,
in
Change the preposition
on
show examples
 the contrary, I think that
such
Linking Words
 acts should be done with
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
big love and joy. People may
success
Replace the word
succeed
show examples
 very well in every job they do when it is done from the heart. Pupils may appreciate
such
Linking Words
a voluntary
Correct the article-noun agreement
voluntary works
a voluntary work
show examples
works
Use synonyms
 much
more
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apply
show examples
better if they understand why they should do it and how much it adds to the others.
To conclude
Linking Words
, I think that everyone can enjoy
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
unpaid
society
Replace the word
social
show examples
 work and
this
Linking Words
 is
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
 good sign of
stable
Correct article usage
a stable
show examples
comunity
Correct your spelling
community
.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, these
works
Use synonyms
 may be more
valueble
Correct your spelling
valuable
 if it is done when the one who
do
Correct subject-verb agreement
does
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
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believe
Correct subject-verb agreement
believes
show examples
 in
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
 and
its
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
 benefits.
Submitted by leenaasalee on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • unpaid community service
  • compulsory part
  • high school programmes
  • charity
  • improving the neighborhood
  • teaching sports
  • civic engagement
  • sense of responsibility
  • valuable skills
  • personal development
  • academic development
  • bridging the gap
  • social and economic groups
  • equal opportunities
  • academic studies
  • extracurricular activities
  • flexibility
  • implementation
  • individual circumstances
What to do next:
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