Children today spend more time watching television than they did in the past. Describe some of the advantages and disadvantages of television for children.

#children #time #television

These days, there is an ongoing debate among folk about watching

shows extensively for kids,

in contrast

to the past.

While

this

can offer various advantages, it can

also

bring about some detrimental effects. In

this

essay, I am going to examine both sides in the forthcoming paragraphs.

To begin

with, there are several advantages of

. In modern life, a huge proportion of people spend lots of

time

watching

. Needless to say,

is a convenient machine for people to watch news on Earth and acquire various knowledge.

As a result

, numerous

children

can watch it to broaden their horizons.

For example

, there are huge channels on YouTube talking about various topics that

children

can learn about.

This

leads to the fact that

children

can positively affect

On the other hand

, the drawbacks of

are undeniable.

This

disadvantage stems from the fact that there are varied contents on

, and

thus

it cannot prevent

children

from negatively impacting these contents.

For instance

, busy parents

tending

Wrong verb form

tend

show examples

to allow their babies to access Youtube to watch their favourite channels without their role

time

As a result

, they do not spend

time

going out and exercising.

This

can lead to the fact that these

children

cannot be provided with the opportunity to boost their immune systems. Watching

for a long

time

can prevent

children

from having a strong body. In conclusion,

although

children

watching

more than in the past can be beneficial in some situations,

this

development can

also

be disadvantageous to a certain extent. Notwithstanding, it is advised to supervise

children

's videos in order to help them stop negative content.

Submitted by maitruonghongvan2403 on Thu Oct 26 2023

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11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

educational programs
diverse cultures
entertainment options
language skills
critical thinking
social awareness
shared experience
sedentary lifestyle
inappropriate content
academic performance
attention problems
social skills
commercial influence
addiction

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