It is important for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages ?

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Some
people
Use synonyms
believe that
running
Verb problem
living
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
life
Use synonyms
with the same habit day by day
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
them satisfied with what they get in their
life
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Although
Correct word choice
However
show examples
, others argue that
make
Wrong verb form
making
show examples
a
little
Correct quantifier usage
few
show examples
changes in their
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
is
paramount
Add an article
a paramount
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aspect not only contributing
on
Change preposition
to
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their
career
Use synonyms
but
also
Linking Words
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
individual
Correct pronoun usage
their individual
show examples
lives as a human. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will argue that taking some different
aspect
Fix the agreement mistake
aspects
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Change noun form
people's
show examples
live
Replace the word
lives
show examples
will increase their knowledge and obtain their success. One of
good
Correct article usage
the good
show examples
point
Fix the agreement mistake
points
show examples
in terms of taking
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
show examples
is
people
Use synonyms
can
board
Verb problem
broaden
show examples
their
horizon
Fix the agreement mistake
horizons
show examples
.
People
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can learn from Many kinds of jobs making individual struggle with it. Take nurses as an example,
the
Change the word
their
show examples
Use synonyms
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
need many
struggle
Change to a plural noun
struggles
show examples
in caring
Change preposition
for patient
show examples
patient
Fix the agreement mistake
patients
show examples
. They may find
difficult
Correct pronoun usage
it difficult
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to service many patients
Correct pronoun usage
who complaint
show examples
complaint
Replace the word
complain
show examples
about their health, but in
this
Linking Words
case
Add a comma
case,
show examples
they learn more
how
Change preposition
about how
show examples
to
over come
Correct your spelling
overcome
show examples
and find the solution.
Linking Words
Further more
Correct your spelling
Furthermore
show examples
,
beside deal
Change preposition
besides dealing
show examples
with the situation they will gain more success.
Other
Change the wording
Another
show examples
benefit when humankind
taking
Wrong verb form
takes
show examples
some new possibility is
their
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
would obtain achievement in their
life
Use synonyms
, in spite of finding some difficulties to cope with the new
career
Use synonyms
. Many
down side
Correct your spelling
downside
show examples
effect
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
former
Correct article usage
a former
show examples
job might lead to
feel
Change the verb form
feeling
show examples
unpleasant ,
unsatisfied
Correct word choice
and unsatisfied
show examples
,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
make
level
Correct pronoun usage
them level
show examples
down
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their motivation and braveness, to
built
Change the form of the verb
build
show examples
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
career
Use synonyms
and gain other opportunities. A little effort to
dealt
Change the form of the verb
deal
show examples
with change and make some new strategies and good
plan
Fix the agreement mistake
plans
show examples
will change individual
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
to be more
accomplishment
Replace the word
accomplished
show examples
.
For instance
Linking Words
,
a
Change the article
an
show examples
online retailer who failed in
maiden
Correct pronoun usage
their maiden
his maiden
her maiden
show examples
attempt to be a professional business
do
Verb problem
makes
show examples
some effort,
create
Correct word choice
and create
show examples
an
Change the article
a
show examples
new innovation can put him/her become a
succeed
Replace the word
successful
show examples
person. In conclusion,
taking
Correct your spelling
making
show examples
a changes
Correct the article-noun agreement
changes
a change
show examples
in order to deal with
Correct article usage
an
show examples
individual’s
life
Use synonyms
problems is
benefit
Replace the word
a beneficial
show examples
aspect
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
human
life
Use synonyms
in order to
board
Verb problem
broaden
show examples
the horizon and achieve
the successful
Correct your spelling
success
show examples
.
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task response
Make sure to address all parts of the task prompt and provide a clear opinion.
coherence cohesion
Work on improving the logical structure of your essay by organizing your ideas more coherently.
lexical resource
Expand your range of vocabulary and use more precise and varied language.
grammatical range
Pay attention to your sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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