some people think saving money is good,but others think that spending money is a better way to enjoy life.

Opinions diverge when it comes to the question of which
approach
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
spending
money
ensures
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
life
.
While
certain individuals advocate
for
Change preposition
that
show examples
saving
money
is beneficial as it gives a way out of uncertainties of
life
and provides a quality
life
, as opposing perspective emphasizes the significance of spending
money
is
Correct your spelling
as
show examples
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
pleasurable way to enjoy
life
.
This
essay will explore both perspectives and present my own viewpoint. I firmly support the notion that saving
money
is a better
approach
.
This
viewpoint is substantiated
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
several compelling points. The viewpoint
advocate
Change the verb form
advocates
show examples
the
Correct determiner usage
that
show examples
spending
money
, often championed by
crowd
Add an article
the crowd
a crowd
show examples
is not without merit. It certainly offers a superior lifestyle and spending
money
on experiences with loved ones, is worthless. People who prefer to save
money
, prefer to not enjoy
life
, not live
life
, but just survive. Keeping
money
in the bank account
while
working is not the ideal way to live, and it prevents
individual
Fix the agreement mistake
individuals
show examples
from comprehending the real meaning of
life
.
For instance
, it is not possible to know whether someone is granted a long or short existence, and
consequently
, whether there is or not
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
possibility to enjoy the
money
that has been saved up. IC have known many people in my country, who spent most of their existence giving up holidays or other pleasant moments in order to keep a significant sum for the years of retirement.
Then
they fell ill before that time
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they lost the opportunity to really enjoy
life
. Paradoxically the concept of saving
money
is
relatively
Add an article
a relatively
show examples
practical
approach
, and it has been ardently endorsed by people from various spheres of
life
. The efficacy of
this
approach
cannot be denied at any cost on practical
ground
Fix the agreement mistake
grounds
show examples
. Putting aside a sum of
money
systematically
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can help you steer out of many hurdles and obstacles in
life
.
For example
, recently in the USA
due to
the job recession, individuals faced a lot of financial problems,
however
Add a comma
however,
show examples
folks
that
Correct pronoun usage
who
show examples
survived out those who saved
money
.
To conclude
,
although
both stances have their own feasibility and viability, I believe that saving
money
is purely a beneficial and practical
approach
. And
therefore
,
opponents
Change noun form
opponents'
opponent's
show examples
idea is
little
Correct article usage
a little
show examples
absurd and less practical in its original context.
Submitted by mwadood82 on

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that the introduction clearly states both perspectives on the topic and provides a clear thesis statement.
task achievement
Use more specific examples and evidence to support your ideas.
lexical resource
Expand your vocabulary by using a wider range of words and phrases.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and avoid errors in grammar and punctuation.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Financial stability
  • Security
  • Freedom
  • Pursue dreams and goals
  • Emergency funds
  • Experiences
  • Enjoyment
  • Quality of life
  • Improving
  • Purchases
  • Supporting
  • Economy
  • Creating jobs
  • Balance
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