Some say that parents whose children are breaking the law must be punished in some way. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#say #parents #children #law

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Law is a set of

rule

Fix the agreement mistake

rules

show examples

and regulations meant to be followed by all under any circumstances. Most

poeople

Correct your spelling

people

believe that for the crimes

commited

Correct your spelling

committed

by the younsters, their

parents

Use synonyms

are the

one

Correct pronoun usage

ones

show examples

who should be held

resposible

Correct your spelling

responsible

and

in particular

Linking Words

liable action must be taken

upon

Change preposition

against

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them. I completely disagree with the

above stated

Add a hyphen

above-stated

show examples

notion. Counselling the young age

law breakers

Correct your spelling

lawbreakers

show examples

through various methods,

as well as

Linking Words

teaching the

gaurdians

Correct your spelling

guardians

forsee

Correct your spelling

foresee

show examples

the signs of a criminal mind will prove

this

Linking Words

To begin

Linking Words

with, we are only humans and we make a lot of mistakes.

According

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According to

show examples

the legislature if a

children

Change the noun form

child

show examples

commits a

crime

Use synonyms

he/she will not be sent to

Remove the article

apply

show examples

jail, rather than they are put under strict

obeservation

Correct your spelling

observation

for a

breif

Correct your spelling

brief

amount of time. There is no point in holding

parents

Use synonyms

responsible for the deeds of their offspring.

Along with

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

, a lot of new government agencies have emerged

Change preposition

apply

show examples

recently whose main aim is to make these young ones realise the dark world that comes tagged along when they open the doors to the

crime

Use synonyms

world.

For instance

Linking Words

after

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apply

show examples

the implementation of juvenile rehabilitation

programme

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programmes

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which

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does

show examples

not hold the law

brakers

Correct your spelling

breakers

captive

confined

Correct word choice

and confined

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in a cell but

Linking Words

along

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apply

show examples

with the use of advanced technology portray the multiple reactions there one action could

genrate

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generate

As a

Linking Words

result

Add a comma

result,

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there has been a shocking 35 per cent decline in

child commited

Correct your spelling

child-committed

crimes nationwide.

Furthermore

Linking Words

, the starting point of any

crime

Use synonyms

story begins at home, it can be clearly seen that caretakers specifically impose a great influence on their

childs

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child's

show examples

thinking process. Not only

they

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do they

show examples

hold the power to manipulate their mind, but

also

Linking Words

they can sense the criminal growing inside them even before their kids know. As the world is becoming more and more

concious

Correct your spelling

conscious

regarding every aspect, there are specific workshops designed for

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

interested

parents

Use synonyms

especially

Add the comma(s)

, especially

show examples

for the ones whose

offsprings

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offspring

show examples

have a

breif

Correct your spelling

brief

history of

commiting

Correct your spelling

committing

unlawful acts.

For example

Linking Words

according to

Linking Words

a survey, the

parents

Use synonyms

who attended the child intervention workshops were able to recognize the early signs of criminal behaviour which eventually helped them in

contolling

Correct your spelling

controlling

them at an early stage.

To sum up

Linking Words

with

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the advent of technology and provocating information available on the internet will continue to

brain wash

Correct your spelling

brainwash

show examples

plenty of young minds into

commiting

Correct your spelling

committing

Use synonyms

crime

Fix the agreement mistake

crimes

show examples

Gaurdians

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Guardians

ought to actively intervene when they feel is

neccessary

Correct your spelling

necessary

. The government of course should impose strict rules for attending rehabilitation workshops for those who are out of

theirs

Correct the word

their

show examples

Use synonyms

parents

Change noun form

parents'

parent's

show examples

reach or have already

commited

Correct your spelling

committed

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

henious

Correct your spelling

heinous

acts.

Submitted by mrigankingley2099 on Mon Oct 30 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and supports the main argument of the essay.

coherence cohesion

Provide a more substantial introduction and conclusion that clearly present the main argument and summarize the essay.

lexical resource

Expand your vocabulary and use more precise and varied language throughout the essay.

grammatical range

Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to avoid errors that can affect the clarity of your ideas.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
45
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

423 words

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Some say that parents whose children are breaking the law must be punished in some way. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Word Count

Too much emphasis is given for the education of students. More government money should be spent on free time activities for young people. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Parents should encourage their children to spend less time on studying and more time on physical activities. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The process below shows about make bread in factory.

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more important environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people view teenage conflict with their parents a necessary part of growing up, whilst others see it as something negative which should be avoided. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.