Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?
It
is
can be seen that each year Unnecessary verb
apply
have
a lot of Unnecessary verb
apply
mney
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money
which
has been invested Correct pronoun usage
apply
to explore
outside the Change preposition
in exploring
Earth
.Nevertheless
,many individuals think that improving living standards on Earth
are more nescessary
.I totally Correct your spelling
necessary
agreed
with Wrong verb form
agree
thiss
statement and the idea to discuss will Correct your spelling
this
demonstrate
in Wrong verb form
be demonstrated
this
essay.
On the one hand,spending millions of dollars on space are
not Change the verb form
is
suitalbe
Correct your spelling
suitable
with
Change preposition
for
situation
in the world today.The problem of war is happening between Add an article
the situation
a situation
Europes
and it Fix the agreement mistake
Europe
make
money is decreased in recent Change the verb form
makes
year
.Fix the agreement mistake
years
In addition
,demanding
of people Wrong verb form
the demand
also
need
money to invest Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
about
health and education for countries which developing.Change preposition
in
For example
,India is one of areas
have date children cannot go to school Add an article
the areas
account
for Wrong verb form
accounting
highest
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the highest
precentage
in the world because Correct your spelling
percentage
this
countryextremely
poor and still Replace the word
country is extremely
distinguish
gender.Correct subject-verb agreement
distinguishes
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,Correct your spelling
Therefore
instead
of spending money to explore space,each countries's
government should use these for Fix the agreement mistake
country's
donation
Fix the agreement mistake
donations
developing
areas to improve life Change preposition
to developing
due to
have
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having
a
good terms with other countries.
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
On the other hand
,many opinion
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opinions
argued
that Wrong verb form
argue
mney
should be invested to improve living quality on the Correct your spelling
money
earth
.People is
more and more increasing and demanding Change the verb form
are
to
education and health need to Change preposition
apply
state-of-the art
In conclusion, Add a hyphen
state-of-the-art
whereas
carrying on an investigation on the universe will benefit our lives in some
certain ways, which, to be specific, is protecting the Correct quantifier usage
apply
Earth
and explore
the planets that are able to dwell in, other social problems in education and health Wrong verb form
exploring
also
are in dire need of monetary support. It is of vital essence for government to spend their coffer wisely according to
each country’s status.Submitted by zky1705202 on
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coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear thesis statement in the introduction. Make sure to clearly state your position on the topic.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure of the essay is generally clear, but some ideas could be better organized. Consider using paragraphs to separate different ideas and provide a topic sentence for each paragraph.
coherence cohesion
The essay could provide more developed examples and explanations to support the main points. Try to provide specific details and evidence to strengthen your arguments.
task achievement
The essay addresses the topic, but some ideas are not fully developed or clearly explained. Make sure to fully respond to the task prompt and provide clear and comprehensive ideas.
lexical resource
The essay could benefit from more varied vocabulary and more precise word choices. Try to expand your range of vocabulary and use appropriate academic language.
grammatical range
The essay has some errors in grammar, including subject-verb agreement and incorrect word forms. Review grammar rules and proofread your essay to avoid these errors.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.