Millions of dollars are spent on space research every year. Some people argue that the money should be spent on improving living standards on Earth. Do you agree or disagree?
Spending a lot of capital on researching how to go out of the earth has sparked debates among
community
. Some argue that putting property into Add an article
the community
this
research is wasteful, whereas
others think otherwise
. I lean toward the belief that it is better to invest wage
in nations to enhance their economies and raise the crowd's living standards.
Fix the agreement mistake
wages
To begin
with, many public on the earth are still struggling with poverty and they need help from the authority
and private companies. Fix the agreement mistake
authorities
For example
, research in the USA shows that 65% of nation
aged 20 to 50 years are still living below the poverty minimum line. Correct article usage
the nation
The politics
is not able to help them completely raise their living standards because the nation's economic conditions are not stable.
Correct article usage
Politics
Instead
of investing fund
in researching how to go to space, the ministry should allocate wealth to the domestics to stimulate the economic cycle to work progressively and increase the economies of folk. To add to Fix the agreement mistake
funds
this
, private companies should collaborate with the regime and work together to provide many training skills programs for society to encourage the skills that are needed in the working world or even skills to be an entrepreneur.
To conclude
, spending amount of payment on researching how to live in space is a new big breakthrough in the astronomy research field, I lean toward the notion that allocating cash to people in need is crucial and should be considered because many population
are still in need Change to a plural noun
populations
and
living under the poverty minimum line. The rule and private companies should focus on raising family's living standards rather than wasting salary on researching that many people are not able to get the benefits from it.Change preposition
of and
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task achievement
You need to make your argument stronger by providing specific and relevant examples. For instance, mentioning real-world scenarios or statistics related to space research funding versus poverty alleviation would strengthen your points.
task achievement
Some areas in your essay lack clarity and might confuse the reader. It's important to use precise language and correct terms. For example, 'property' might not be the best synonym for 'money' or 'funds.'
coherence cohesion
While your paragraphs are logically structured and the transitions are clear, certain sentences are a bit awkwardly phrased, which can disrupt the flow. It's important to make sure each sentence clearly connects to the next.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion, summarizing your points effectively.
task achievement
You have a well-defined stance and you maintain it throughout the essay, which shows a good task response.
coherence cohesion
The overall logical structure of your essay is sound, with each paragraph addressing a specific point relevant to your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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