Many high school students take part time jobs. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In
this
Linking Words
economically advanced and competitive era, high
school
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
are engaging in
Use synonyms
part-timetime
Correct your spelling
part-time
Jobs
Use synonyms
frequently.
Hence
Linking Words
, the
Use synonyms
part-timetime
Correct your spelling
part-time
jobs
Use synonyms
market
is
Wrong verb form
was
show examples
created and
seeing
Wrong verb form
saw
show examples
a huge surge. It is a great opportunity for the
students
Use synonyms
to step into the real-world work scenario and have experience of the same which will greatly benefit them towards their learning procedure.
However
Linking Words
, there are some negative aspects associated with it.
To begin
Linking Words
with, working
Correct your spelling
part-time
part-timetime
Use synonyms
jobs
Use synonyms
will add some positive advantages to
students
Use synonyms
'
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, they work as an individual and gain different perspectives on how to deal with certain situations. The high
school
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
learn about
monetary
Correct article usage
the monetary
show examples
aspect as well. Life-long lessons like communications, customer value, management skills etc. will bring the best version out of them.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
movement will affect the country's economic affairs in a positive way as the young generations
are
Verb problem
will
show examples
receiving
Wrong verb form
receive
show examples
high-quality teachings in their life by
making
Verb problem
giving
show examples
them equipped with the proper knowledge to be a well-rounded individual.
Nonetheless
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
movement brings in some disadvantages as well. High
school
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
are so engrossed with money aspect that, they neglect their studies very often. They are much more prone to working and earning than gaining knowledge.
Consequently
Linking Words
, the number of graduate individuals is gradually decreasing. The repercussions are huge considering the country's educated individuals and growth. As high
school
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
are being exposed to
such
Linking Words
competitive markets very early in their age, they don't have the time needed to nourish their
body
Fix the agreement mistake
bodies
show examples
and
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
will create a negative view and disjoint society. In conclusion, working in
Use synonyms
part-timetime
Correct your spelling
part-time
jobs
Use synonyms
has both advantages and disadvantages. Striking a balance between study and work is essential for the
students
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
movement will bring unprecedented positive outcomes for the
student's
Change noun form
students'
show examples
development if executed in a properly balanced way.
Submitted by nehakarmakar45 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph links to the main topic and supports the main ideas effectively.
task achievement
Provide more specific examples to illustrate the advantages and disadvantages of part-time jobs for high school students.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary to enhance the richness and variety of your essay.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure and grammar to improve clarity and precision in your writing.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: